Greetings, fellow beings!
Was I dead? Buried alive? Kidnapped? Sent to HELL? No, I merely forgot to post.
BOOKS YOU MUUUUUUUUUSSSST READ
Hiroshi Ishikaki- Chain Mail.
1984. What? It's bloody awesome.
A RANT, PUBLISHED HERE BECAUSE I NEED TO VENT THIS.
I am in the Creative Writing club at school, and you know what we are doing? MEMOIRS. Memoirs, people! We have not even had any exploits that panicked the nation! We are in middle school! Any memoirs we write will be the I-learned-a-lesson-when-my-dog-died or my-having-a-baby-makes-me-interesting badly written type. I want to write about love! About magic! About fighting! About evil! About dystopian empires! Not about my memories. I'm far too young and untwisted for those to be interesting.
Friday, December 21, 2012
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Death! Ruin! Destruction!
COWER, BRIEF MORTALS.
I hate almost everything about the holidays, but they have some good things about them. To wit:
1. Presents.
2. Hogfather, Terry Pratchett. I love this book so much it isn't even funny.
3. Hark To The Bells. That's a favorite song, carol or otherwise.
4. The Nutcracker.
5. A Christmas Carol. Who'd pass up a chance to see another festive Grim Reaper?
6. Holiday break.
7. Christmas lights.
8. Chocolate coins.
9. Decorating trees.
10. Saturday Night Live Christmas special, which we watched last night.
11. FIRE!!!
12. Snow.
13. I've run out of things.
What I don't like:
1. Santa.
2. Latkes. I detest latkes.
3. 99% of all holiday songs.
4. That the aforementioned crappy songs are all they ever play on the radio or in Barnes and Noble.
5. 99% of all holiday movies.
6. That Hanukah is never on the break.
7. Barbie's A Christmas Carol and The Nutcracker. I actually screamed "HOW CAN YOU DEFILE THE JOY OF THE HOLIDAYS?!?!" when I saw those.
8. The cold.
9. Socializing with relatives. This is normally okay, but in large groups? I DO NOT LIKE THE GROUPS. I get uncomfortable at my own birthday party.
10. That my otherwise awesome family-friend neighbors always show the horrible Christmas movies.
11. Droning in Hebrew.
12. Advent calenders.
13. Candy canes.
Oh, I shouldn't be so ambivalent about this! After all, I am Eggnog, according to the 'What Hot Beverage Are You?' quiz I took once. So, I should like the holidays.
Right.
I'll stop pretending to be Scrooge rather than the Ghost of Christmas Future and let you get on with your life, shall I?
I hate almost everything about the holidays, but they have some good things about them. To wit:
1. Presents.
2. Hogfather, Terry Pratchett. I love this book so much it isn't even funny.
3. Hark To The Bells. That's a favorite song, carol or otherwise.
4. The Nutcracker.
5. A Christmas Carol. Who'd pass up a chance to see another festive Grim Reaper?
6. Holiday break.
7. Christmas lights.
8. Chocolate coins.
9. Decorating trees.
10. Saturday Night Live Christmas special, which we watched last night.
11. FIRE!!!
12. Snow.
13. I've run out of things.
What I don't like:
1. Santa.
2. Latkes. I detest latkes.
3. 99% of all holiday songs.
4. That the aforementioned crappy songs are all they ever play on the radio or in Barnes and Noble.
5. 99% of all holiday movies.
6. That Hanukah is never on the break.
7. Barbie's A Christmas Carol and The Nutcracker. I actually screamed "HOW CAN YOU DEFILE THE JOY OF THE HOLIDAYS?!?!" when I saw those.
8. The cold.
9. Socializing with relatives. This is normally okay, but in large groups? I DO NOT LIKE THE GROUPS. I get uncomfortable at my own birthday party.
10. That my otherwise awesome family-friend neighbors always show the horrible Christmas movies.
11. Droning in Hebrew.
12. Advent calenders.
13. Candy canes.
Oh, I shouldn't be so ambivalent about this! After all, I am Eggnog, according to the 'What Hot Beverage Are You?' quiz I took once. So, I should like the holidays.
Right.
I'll stop pretending to be Scrooge rather than the Ghost of Christmas Future and let you get on with your life, shall I?
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
OOOOOOOOOH....
ODD–THELLO
A dream: I was in a bookstore, reading a graphic novel of Othello, and it was modernized. At first, Othello and Desdemona has not yet met, and I was like 'It's okay...it just hasn't gotten started...'. Then things got odd, and there were guerrilla attacks, fairies, long train rides, a coffee shop, and, for some reason, Fai D. Florite (WHAT'S WITH YOU, TSUBASA? GET THE HELL OUT OF MY DREAMS!). Moral: no more Shakespeare before bedtime. OR ELSE YOU WILL HAVE ODD DREAMS TO THE POINT IN WHICH VAMPIRES SIT IN COFFEE SHOPS AND ARE ATTACKED BY THE POLICE.
._______________________.
It's gonna be Hannukah soon! On the first night, we'll decorate the neighbor's Christmas tree OH THE IRONY. I don't care about that, because I have a chance to read Terry Pratchett(a new favorite) and I SHALL NOT GIVE UP! NEVER GIVE UP! GET STRONGER! MUCH STRONGER!
._______________________.
Carpe Jugulum!(my new motto)
A dream: I was in a bookstore, reading a graphic novel of Othello, and it was modernized. At first, Othello and Desdemona has not yet met, and I was like 'It's okay...it just hasn't gotten started...'. Then things got odd, and there were guerrilla attacks, fairies, long train rides, a coffee shop, and, for some reason, Fai D. Florite (WHAT'S WITH YOU, TSUBASA? GET THE HELL OUT OF MY DREAMS!). Moral: no more Shakespeare before bedtime. OR ELSE YOU WILL HAVE ODD DREAMS TO THE POINT IN WHICH VAMPIRES SIT IN COFFEE SHOPS AND ARE ATTACKED BY THE POLICE.
._______________________.
It's gonna be Hannukah soon! On the first night, we'll decorate the neighbor's Christmas tree OH THE IRONY. I don't care about that, because I have a chance to read Terry Pratchett(a new favorite) and I SHALL NOT GIVE UP! NEVER GIVE UP! GET STRONGER! MUCH STRONGER!
._______________________.
Carpe Jugulum!(my new motto)
Sunday, December 2, 2012
Mirror/Reflection
Happy holidays to all you readers. I am currently in the OH GOD GET STUFF MUST GET STUFF NOW!!!! phase of Holiday StressTM, and it is DIFFICULT. Never daunted, I go on.
.__________________________.
Have you seen the Animal Farm movie? It is the worst thing I have ever seen. It has smashed apples, which scared the &*#( out of me, as that is my hot-button phobia. I cannot deal with fruit grossness! However, it changed SNOWBALL! from being like Granny Weatherwax to being like Magrat. From the Doctor to Rory. From Yuko to Watanuki. From Minako to- OKAY OKAY WE GET IT ALREADY. And they had a sucky-ass ending, and lowered Benjamin and Mollie's participation(BASTARDS!)and GOT RID OF CLOVER AND THE CAT! BASTARDS! Oh, and they also made Benjamin less cynical. THAT'S WHY WE LIKED HIM BASTARDS.
However, OH MY GOD SO FUNNY! The constant rain! The overwrought music! The movies! Oh my god, the movies! Adjectives fail me. They just...fail me.
The puppies were adorable. It is the rare movie that cannot be saved by putting in puppies. It was not saved.
.________________________.
At one point in my theater class, I was informed by the teacher that a class had at one point put on a post-apocalyptic Antigone. A girl in my class was much taken by this fact. Sensei kept trying to change the subject, and SHE WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS was like, 'Wait. What about the Antigone?'
._________________________.
THE BEST WALK EVER.
So, my mother and I were walking back to my school from a school tour, and we saw:
1. One of those mannequins with no head on a bicycle, in winter garb, and delivering presents. This was in the window of a liquor store(of course). OH GOD HE KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE.
2. An ad for a band whose graphic was a child with the head of a snarling bear holding a limp teddy bear in one hand.
3. That ad with the giant gnome who kidnaps people. New Yorkers will know what I mean.
._______________________.
Let's end this farce!
.__________________________.
Have you seen the Animal Farm movie? It is the worst thing I have ever seen. It has smashed apples, which scared the &*#( out of me, as that is my hot-button phobia. I cannot deal with fruit grossness! However, it changed SNOWBALL! from being like Granny Weatherwax to being like Magrat. From the Doctor to Rory. From Yuko to Watanuki. From Minako to- OKAY OKAY WE GET IT ALREADY. And they had a sucky-ass ending, and lowered Benjamin and Mollie's participation(BASTARDS!)and GOT RID OF CLOVER AND THE CAT! BASTARDS! Oh, and they also made Benjamin less cynical. THAT'S WHY WE LIKED HIM BASTARDS.
However, OH MY GOD SO FUNNY! The constant rain! The overwrought music! The movies! Oh my god, the movies! Adjectives fail me. They just...fail me.
The puppies were adorable. It is the rare movie that cannot be saved by putting in puppies. It was not saved.
.________________________.
At one point in my theater class, I was informed by the teacher that a class had at one point put on a post-apocalyptic Antigone. A girl in my class was much taken by this fact. Sensei kept trying to change the subject, and SHE WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS was like, 'Wait. What about the Antigone?'
._________________________.
THE BEST WALK EVER.
So, my mother and I were walking back to my school from a school tour, and we saw:
1. One of those mannequins with no head on a bicycle, in winter garb, and delivering presents. This was in the window of a liquor store(of course). OH GOD HE KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE.
2. An ad for a band whose graphic was a child with the head of a snarling bear holding a limp teddy bear in one hand.
3. That ad with the giant gnome who kidnaps people. New Yorkers will know what I mean.
._______________________.
Let's end this farce!
Sunday, November 25, 2012
In The Mere Shallow Concave Hollow Of Despair
A NOTE TO ALL STUDENTS AND TEACHERS AT MY MIDDLE SCHOOL
I am she who responded to the Do Not Reply email with 'Ok. I won't reply.' It was calling me, okay? I had to do it.
.___________________________.
HOW TO GET TO SLEEP WITHOUT LOSING YOUR SOUL.
I am a chronic insomniac. Not an 'oh, it's 10:35, I went to bed at 10:00' way, I mean an 'I went to bed at 10:00 and it is now 1:00, and I am too restless and fidgety to think, so all I can do is play with my lamp(ooh that sounds dirty) or meditate on the numeral display of my clock radio.' So, I have devised these:
Ways to get to sleep during that Long Dark Teatime of the Soul!
1. Stare at ceiling.
2. Curl up in fetal position under covers and pretend you are gravely injured.
3. Hold a mock battle of the bands, where you sing and jump around, without getting out of bed.
4. Rehash every comic moment from Tsubasa. Out loud.
5. Monologue about what is going on in books you are reading.
6. Write mental top-13 lists.
7. Think up elaborate fan-fic scenarios in which everybody dies.
8. Sing every Slings and Arrows theme song there was.
9. Write mental fan-fic that doesn't end in everybody dying.
10. Perform fan-fic. Out loud. Without getting out of bed.
11. Dream up ideas for what you are writing.
12. Rant about What Is Wrong With The World.
13. Pick up your flash drive. Note its pleasing color, shape, and texture. Meditate on it.
.________________________________.
Awesome copy on back of a library book- 'This well-written, high-action fantasy GRABS READERS AND NEVER LETS GO.'
Nice random capitalization there, friend.
._____________________________________.
That's all for tonight, folks!
I am she who responded to the Do Not Reply email with 'Ok. I won't reply.' It was calling me, okay? I had to do it.
.___________________________.
HOW TO GET TO SLEEP WITHOUT LOSING YOUR SOUL.
I am a chronic insomniac. Not an 'oh, it's 10:35, I went to bed at 10:00' way, I mean an 'I went to bed at 10:00 and it is now 1:00, and I am too restless and fidgety to think, so all I can do is play with my lamp(ooh that sounds dirty) or meditate on the numeral display of my clock radio.' So, I have devised these:
Ways to get to sleep during that Long Dark Teatime of the Soul!
1. Stare at ceiling.
2. Curl up in fetal position under covers and pretend you are gravely injured.
3. Hold a mock battle of the bands, where you sing and jump around, without getting out of bed.
4. Rehash every comic moment from Tsubasa. Out loud.
5. Monologue about what is going on in books you are reading.
6. Write mental top-13 lists.
7. Think up elaborate fan-fic scenarios in which everybody dies.
8. Sing every Slings and Arrows theme song there was.
9. Write mental fan-fic that doesn't end in everybody dying.
10. Perform fan-fic. Out loud. Without getting out of bed.
11. Dream up ideas for what you are writing.
12. Rant about What Is Wrong With The World.
13. Pick up your flash drive. Note its pleasing color, shape, and texture. Meditate on it.
.________________________________.
Awesome copy on back of a library book- 'This well-written, high-action fantasy GRABS READERS AND NEVER LETS GO.'
Nice random capitalization there, friend.
._____________________________________.
That's all for tonight, folks!
Friday, November 23, 2012
Autistic Blueberry
So. Thanksgiving. Let's all give thanks for the good things, like Kristin Cashore, cats, Mokona, and snowmen. My Thanksgiving was mainly reading the New Yorker while trying not to kill my cousins. Let's give thanks for fratricide! And Hamlet!
SPEAKING OF THE NEW YORKER
I have an obsession with reading their reviews of both TV shows and of Wagnerian opera. I have never watched most of the shows, nor seen Wagner performed, but I love reading their reviews.
.____________________________________.
Why? Why do I keep having weird dreams about Kuro-pippi? This time, there was Po from Graceling(god I love that series), who looked inexplicably like Masayoshi from Tsubasa in that dream. Then, there was Fai, and a river, and more about Po. That is all I can remember, except that there was a barbarian-type guy in black leather who had long hair beating his chest and howling at the sky. Maybe I should stop reading before bed...but then I wouldn't have my weird dreams about colorful demon babies and Sakura-chan dressed like a cowgirl, which would be sad.
SPEAKING OF THE NEW YORKER
I have an obsession with reading their reviews of both TV shows and of Wagnerian opera. I have never watched most of the shows, nor seen Wagner performed, but I love reading their reviews.
.____________________________________.
Why? Why do I keep having weird dreams about Kuro-pippi? This time, there was Po from Graceling(god I love that series), who looked inexplicably like Masayoshi from Tsubasa in that dream. Then, there was Fai, and a river, and more about Po. That is all I can remember, except that there was a barbarian-type guy in black leather who had long hair beating his chest and howling at the sky. Maybe I should stop reading before bed...but then I wouldn't have my weird dreams about colorful demon babies and Sakura-chan dressed like a cowgirl, which would be sad.
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
He Needs To Be More Droll
SOME THINGS I MUTTERED TO MYSELF.
Great. Injured cranky vampires.
Of course I haven't twisted anyone's head off!
A very nice girl who happens to be a harbringer of the apocalypse.
The Doctor's married!?!?
There was a guy with long hair and he started being a jerk, so I beat him up.
EXPLANATIONS
1. Well, at this point in the story I was making up in my head, there was one.
2. A defensive exclamation.
3. Describing Hotaru-chan.
4. Well, he is.
5. The character speaking was referring to King Ashura. I just did this to vindicate myself on some of the recent events in Tsubasa because HE PISSED ME OFF. But he has nothing on Fei-Wang Reed. AARGH I HATE THAT MAN. Maybe next time I'm hungry, instead of running down an elk and eating it raw, I'll eat him raw. And yes, I know he's fictional. And I don't actually run down elks.
._________________________________.
Me and Petronella have created someone named Richard Ursius Neal(Oh my god, that NAME!)who may be WORSE THAN FAI OR THE DOCTOR OR EVEN YUKO. Horrors! He's hilarious and he says things like this:
RANDOMO: What's your greatest fear?
R.U.N: That man-woman-adult-child, Justine Behbehr!
.__________________________________.
My new favorite goodbye phrase is 'Go forth, and spread beauty and light!' So go and do that, or whatever you kids do these days.
Great. Injured cranky vampires.
Of course I haven't twisted anyone's head off!
A very nice girl who happens to be a harbringer of the apocalypse.
The Doctor's married!?!?
There was a guy with long hair and he started being a jerk, so I beat him up.
EXPLANATIONS
1. Well, at this point in the story I was making up in my head, there was one.
2. A defensive exclamation.
3. Describing Hotaru-chan.
4. Well, he is.
5. The character speaking was referring to King Ashura. I just did this to vindicate myself on some of the recent events in Tsubasa because HE PISSED ME OFF. But he has nothing on Fei-Wang Reed. AARGH I HATE THAT MAN. Maybe next time I'm hungry, instead of running down an elk and eating it raw, I'll eat him raw. And yes, I know he's fictional. And I don't actually run down elks.
._________________________________.
Me and Petronella have created someone named Richard Ursius Neal(Oh my god, that NAME!)who may be WORSE THAN FAI OR THE DOCTOR OR EVEN YUKO. Horrors! He's hilarious and he says things like this:
RANDOMO: What's your greatest fear?
R.U.N: That man-woman-adult-child, Justine Behbehr!
.__________________________________.
My new favorite goodbye phrase is 'Go forth, and spread beauty and light!' So go and do that, or whatever you kids do these days.
Saturday, November 17, 2012
Even So Small A Child
SOMETHING I WROTE WHEN I WAS VERY YOUNG
One day Lilia,
the cute guinea pig, was walking with Curial Flue Lozano III(CFL3),the duck,
when Lilia turned giant. CFL3 ran away, but Lilia stepped on Moo, the weird
elf. Than Fatso*, the fisherman guy, poured syrup and hot fudge and whipped
cream on Moo. Lilia thought Moo was a pancake and tried to eat him, but
luckily, a girl named Tris came
along and saved Moo. She had magic
powers, so she brought Lilia back to normal size. Curial hated her, but she was
still Moo and Lilia’s friend.
No, I don't know either.
._____________________________________________.
._____________________________________________.
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I think I'm doing it wrong.
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major General
An actual text exchange between me and Melody:
Melody: Well, I'm tired. *yawn*Night!
Me: SLEEP NO MORE! GLAMIS HATH MURDERED SLEEP AND THEREFORE CAWDOR SHALL SLEEP NO MORE. MACBETH SHALL SLEEP NO MORE. Night.
.__________________________________.
IT'S A WHALE!
Greatest hits of the racist boys in my math class:
French is boring. It's all about croissants.
Guy #1: You are the smartest black person ever!
Guy #2: I don't know if that's racist or a compliment.
.___________________________________.
ANOTHER WHALE!
WHY ONE SHOULD NOT READ TSUBASA AND ANIMAL FARM AT THE SAME TIME (Spoiler alert for both!)
I have meme-ish things going through my head, and the latest one was that picture from Volume 20 of Tsubasa where Fai and Yui are like six or four, and standing in the black panel with fancy outfits and solemn faces.
Then I had the meme 'Four legs good, two legs better!' going through my head.
Then I got them mixed up.
Imagine the cute solemn identical twins in their fancy outfits (Oops, major spoiler there) suddenly creepily smiling and saying in this little-kid voice, as one "Four legs good, two legs be-e-e-eter!"
I'm still trying to get over it.
Melody: Well, I'm tired. *yawn*Night!
Me: SLEEP NO MORE! GLAMIS HATH MURDERED SLEEP AND THEREFORE CAWDOR SHALL SLEEP NO MORE. MACBETH SHALL SLEEP NO MORE. Night.
.__________________________________.
IT'S A WHALE!
Greatest hits of the racist boys in my math class:
French is boring. It's all about croissants.
Guy #1: You are the smartest black person ever!
Guy #2: I don't know if that's racist or a compliment.
.___________________________________.
ANOTHER WHALE!
WHY ONE SHOULD NOT READ TSUBASA AND ANIMAL FARM AT THE SAME TIME (Spoiler alert for both!)
I have meme-ish things going through my head, and the latest one was that picture from Volume 20 of Tsubasa where Fai and Yui are like six or four, and standing in the black panel with fancy outfits and solemn faces.
Then I had the meme 'Four legs good, two legs better!' going through my head.
Then I got them mixed up.
Imagine the cute solemn identical twins in their fancy outfits (Oops, major spoiler there) suddenly creepily smiling and saying in this little-kid voice, as one "Four legs good, two legs be-e-e-eter!"
I'm still trying to get over it.
Sunday, November 11, 2012
No,There's A Large Rock*
From the letters to fill out in Word's letter templates:
*Punchline to a really tasteless joke about Tsubasa.
**As I mention her a lot, go back and read my archives.
Replace this text with the contents of your letter.
Contents here, lorem et tu brute. Ipsum dorem with lettuce, pickles, and
tomatoes. Please leave out the mustard when preparing the repast. Contents may
shift during packaging, return to sender if completely empty. Thank you, that
is all. Replace this text with the contents of your letter.
Dear Recipient Name:
Replace this text with the contents of your letter. A letter of simplicity for the intended
one to read. To gaze upon, to cast an eye, to thoroughly decipher as one would
a morning newspaper with the hot beverage of choice. Filler copy here.
I will be in touch and look forward to our conversation
with much glee. Please be sure to call with questions.
Have you ever noticed characters who are other versions of another character? For example, Minako from Sailor Moon and Kara from Avalon:Web of Magic. Not to mention Tomoyo** and Hana-chan from Fruits Basket. Ooh, and Hollyleaf and Kasha. I should stop now before I go on forever, but...
CHANGES SUBJECT ABRUPTLY
AWESOMEST LINE IN TSUBASA VOLUME 20
That's what I punch people for!
Okay, maybe that particular awesomeness was awesome in context alone.
But it was awesome.
Have you ever noticed characters who are other versions of another character? For example, Minako from Sailor Moon and Kara from Avalon:Web of Magic. Not to mention Tomoyo** and Hana-chan from Fruits Basket. Ooh, and Hollyleaf and Kasha. I should stop now before I go on forever, but...
CHANGES SUBJECT ABRUPTLY
AWESOMEST LINE IN TSUBASA VOLUME 20
That's what I punch people for!
Okay, maybe that particular awesomeness was awesome in context alone.
But it was awesome.
*Punchline to a really tasteless joke about Tsubasa.
**As I mention her a lot, go back and read my archives.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Corpses Are Fun!
BEST. SPAM. EVER.
Would you mind to finding a young and nice girl of 25?
My name's Julya. I am from Ukraine.
Have you ever heard that the loveliest girls in the world live in my country? Don't even doubt!
Hi there sweet...
Would you mind to finding a young and nice girl of 25?
My name's Julya. I am from Ukraine.
Have you ever heard that the loveliest girls in the world live in my country? Don't even doubt!
I long for finding a special person for serious relations or even family life.
Aren't you the one I am searching for?(actually copied and pasted from spam)
Aren't you the one I am searching for?(actually copied and pasted from spam)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA*breathes deeply*. Why does every spammer think I'm a lesbian? I deleted the ad for the dating organization.
I had a dream last night about taking a pack of M&M's into bed with me, and then the yellow M&M was the only color in the world. I woke up, and looked for the pack. It was 2:53 AM.
The last two lines could be from a smokers' memoir.
TRUE STORY
In science class, we were making models of the solar system. I had chosen Saturn(oh how I love Hotaru-chan) and Neptune to make models of. Then, a kid noticed that there was I problem- Saturn was shown as larger than Jupiter.
So I went to redraw Saturn, the planet of ruin. Then, it still seemed a little large. So, with the knowledge that I was right from looking at the measurements, which only I had copied down at my table, I checked. The other guy was wrong! When I informed him of this fact, he made me draw Jupiter, the planet of thunder, over for him, with the explanation that he'd just get it wrong again.
Now, this might just seem like I'm being drafted as the intellectual mule or pack horse of my group. BUT IT GETS WORSE.
I drew Jupiter, and colored it in with great precision, including the Great Red Spot, which the other guy* had neglected to draw. But it may not have been his fault, for lo and behold, a boy who I shall call Iago, in recognition of his semi-Shakespearean sounding name and bastardness, said I was using too many colors.
"I'm using enough." I said.
"No, you're using too many. Let me color it in for you."
Me: "NO."
So, I finished coloring, and I gave it to him to cut out, for that was his part of the project- the cutting out and taping of the planets to the poster-, with strict instructions to LEAVE THE COLORS ALONE.
He promptly colored the whole thing in the most hideous shade of orange I've ever seen**.
I wait in hope that someday Hay Lin will suffocate him with her wind powers.
*Who actually isn't so bad for a SLACKER.
**Later, I discovered he'd colored in Saturn a hideous uniform orange, though a different shade than Jupiter. I colored that one in worse than Jupiter or Neptune, planet of oceans, but hey, I was rushed. Neptune was unharmed, which is OK.
TRUE STORY
In science class, we were making models of the solar system. I had chosen Saturn(oh how I love Hotaru-chan) and Neptune to make models of. Then, a kid noticed that there was I problem- Saturn was shown as larger than Jupiter.
So I went to redraw Saturn, the planet of ruin. Then, it still seemed a little large. So, with the knowledge that I was right from looking at the measurements, which only I had copied down at my table, I checked. The other guy was wrong! When I informed him of this fact, he made me draw Jupiter, the planet of thunder, over for him, with the explanation that he'd just get it wrong again.
Now, this might just seem like I'm being drafted as the intellectual mule or pack horse of my group. BUT IT GETS WORSE.
I drew Jupiter, and colored it in with great precision, including the Great Red Spot, which the other guy* had neglected to draw. But it may not have been his fault, for lo and behold, a boy who I shall call Iago, in recognition of his semi-Shakespearean sounding name and bastardness, said I was using too many colors.
"I'm using enough." I said.
"No, you're using too many. Let me color it in for you."
Me: "NO."
So, I finished coloring, and I gave it to him to cut out, for that was his part of the project- the cutting out and taping of the planets to the poster-, with strict instructions to LEAVE THE COLORS ALONE.
He promptly colored the whole thing in the most hideous shade of orange I've ever seen**.
I wait in hope that someday Hay Lin will suffocate him with her wind powers.
*Who actually isn't so bad for a SLACKER.
**Later, I discovered he'd colored in Saturn a hideous uniform orange, though a different shade than Jupiter. I colored that one in worse than Jupiter or Neptune, planet of oceans, but hey, I was rushed. Neptune was unharmed, which is OK.
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
How Many Corpses Do We Need? A WHOLE LOT.
Necrogirl go BOOM!
No, I didn't go crazy, I just started reading Angelic Layer and OH MY FROG IT IS SO AWESOME! I have decided to begin all conversations with 'Icchan go BOOM!', or, in my own words, Necrogirl go BOOM! The kung fu girl is really just a repeat of THE DEMON WOMAN. You know, HER. THAT WOMAN. The lady who looks like an evil Yuko-san. HER.
I really dislike that woman.
However, the kung fu girl is nice and has not drank anyone's blood(well, that's what it LOOKED LIKE) or tried to kill anyone. So far. And the five-year old is SOOOOO CUUUUTE even though she is a prequel to Princess Tomoyo. And I get to see the bit-part crossovers(Automata, City Hall girl, librarian AKA Hikaru, Blanche, and Blanche's Deus respectively).
Okay, that was way too many words about Angelic Layer.
But there are evil clowns in Sailor Moon! I LOOOVE the Dream storyline! Clowns! Magic unicorns! Tigers! Evil fish! Usagi's a little kid! Mamo-chan got his ass kicked!
Wait, guess what? Do you want to know how many SAT words can be put in a sentence in a Dungeons and Dragons adventure? You need wonder no more. From Keep On The Shadowfell:
The dank water suddenly disgorges a blob of blue slime. The
amorphous mass pours forward, extruding long pseudopods that
end in appendages of dripping goo.
Seriously, that was AN ACTUAL SENTENCE from the adventure. Pseudopods! Appendages! Were those words just put there to make me happy? If so, good job Dungeons and Dragons writers. You made my day.
Necrogirl go BOOM!
No, I didn't go crazy, I just started reading Angelic Layer and OH MY FROG IT IS SO AWESOME! I have decided to begin all conversations with 'Icchan go BOOM!', or, in my own words, Necrogirl go BOOM! The kung fu girl is really just a repeat of THE DEMON WOMAN. You know, HER. THAT WOMAN. The lady who looks like an evil Yuko-san. HER.
I really dislike that woman.
However, the kung fu girl is nice and has not drank anyone's blood(well, that's what it LOOKED LIKE) or tried to kill anyone. So far. And the five-year old is SOOOOO CUUUUTE even though she is a prequel to Princess Tomoyo. And I get to see the bit-part crossovers(Automata, City Hall girl, librarian AKA Hikaru, Blanche, and Blanche's Deus respectively).
Okay, that was way too many words about Angelic Layer.
But there are evil clowns in Sailor Moon! I LOOOVE the Dream storyline! Clowns! Magic unicorns! Tigers! Evil fish! Usagi's a little kid! Mamo-chan got his ass kicked!
Wait, guess what? Do you want to know how many SAT words can be put in a sentence in a Dungeons and Dragons adventure? You need wonder no more. From Keep On The Shadowfell:
The dank water suddenly disgorges a blob of blue slime. The
amorphous mass pours forward, extruding long pseudopods that
end in appendages of dripping goo.
Seriously, that was AN ACTUAL SENTENCE from the adventure. Pseudopods! Appendages! Were those words just put there to make me happy? If so, good job Dungeons and Dragons writers. You made my day.
Necrogirl go BOOM!
Friday, November 2, 2012
Stabuloso!
I got this excellent spam in my email-
Dear member of our Dating site!
You have 12 unread messages from ladies.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
To explain-
Ladies? I may be unclear about my sexuality(people, I'm only 13!)but to get only ladies? Is this a gay* dating site?
Also, may I point out that I'm not a member?
And...Ladies?
* Heard in Theater class
Girl: Oooh, I want a gay best friend! Named Joey!
Dear member of our Dating site!
You have 12 unread messages from ladies.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
To explain-
Ladies? I may be unclear about my sexuality(people, I'm only 13!)but to get only ladies? Is this a gay* dating site?
Also, may I point out that I'm not a member?
And...Ladies?
* Heard in Theater class
Girl: Oooh, I want a gay best friend! Named Joey!
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
YEH-HEH-HESSSSS!
HALLOWEEN HALLOWEEN HALLOWEEN HALLOWEEN IT'S HALLOWEEN YAAAAAAY!
Happy Halloween. Go bounce some kitties.
Happy Halloween. Go bounce some kitties.
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
No Farting Down In Texas
Me and Momomouse had a sleepover, and if you have never hung out with a friend during a hurricane, you should, because IT ROCKS. However, there was some serious crazy, because when you lock up 3 girls(Chestnut, my little sister, was there as well) in a house and they can't get out...
WHAT WE DID
1. Had an Uglydoll stealing fight.
2. Went underneath quilts and wrestled.
3. Raced around the house yelling 'Return the princess!'
4. Put an Uglydoll in a tissue box.
5. Et cetera.
A SMALL MYSTERY THAT HAPPENED A FEW WEEKS AGO
So, I was checking out the English class library. And I saw a book by Jodi Picoult. At one point on my mom's blog, I'd heard someone comment about how Picoult-san was a terrible writer. So I checked out the back. Then, this nice girl said to me "There's a really good book by her over there."
What I did: Small Tight Smile. 'Thanks.'
What I thought: WHAT THE HELL WHO ARE YOU WHY DO YOU THINK I READ JODI PICOULT?!?!
WHAT WE DID
1. Had an Uglydoll stealing fight.
2. Went underneath quilts and wrestled.
3. Raced around the house yelling 'Return the princess!'
4. Put an Uglydoll in a tissue box.
5. Et cetera.
A SMALL MYSTERY THAT HAPPENED A FEW WEEKS AGO
So, I was checking out the English class library. And I saw a book by Jodi Picoult. At one point on my mom's blog, I'd heard someone comment about how Picoult-san was a terrible writer. So I checked out the back. Then, this nice girl said to me "There's a really good book by her over there."
What I did: Small Tight Smile. 'Thanks.'
What I thought: WHAT THE HELL WHO ARE YOU WHY DO YOU THINK I READ JODI PICOULT?!?!
Sunday, October 28, 2012
By The Force Of The Lion
Good morning! Today's material is...MAHOGANY!
I recently went to Packer on ANOTHER high school tour, and there found...you're gonna love this...LIFE-SIZE CARDBOARD CUTOUTS OF RONALD REAGAN AND MITT ROMNEY. In New York City! I thought that Mitt Romney was going to eat me when I looked at his cutout. Seriously.
I'm doing a Social Studies project where we are assigned an immigrant group, and I got Italian! Mamma mia! I would far prefer to be Irish or Chinese, though. Momomouse got German. On the bad side, one of the racist boys in my math class is now the racist boy in my social studies class.
CHOICE TIDBITS FROM THE RACIST BOYS IN MY MATH CLASS, SERIOUSLY, I AM NOT KIDDING YOU
Usain Bolt runs so fast cause he runs away from the police.
You have the brain of an Asian.
A THING I SAW
A man-a grown man-with one of those adorable Tokidoki bags. Seriously.
I recently went to Packer on ANOTHER high school tour, and there found...you're gonna love this...LIFE-SIZE CARDBOARD CUTOUTS OF RONALD REAGAN AND MITT ROMNEY. In New York City! I thought that Mitt Romney was going to eat me when I looked at his cutout. Seriously.
I'm doing a Social Studies project where we are assigned an immigrant group, and I got Italian! Mamma mia! I would far prefer to be Irish or Chinese, though. Momomouse got German. On the bad side, one of the racist boys in my math class is now the racist boy in my social studies class.
CHOICE TIDBITS FROM THE RACIST BOYS IN MY MATH CLASS, SERIOUSLY, I AM NOT KIDDING YOU
Usain Bolt runs so fast cause he runs away from the police.
You have the brain of an Asian.
A THING I SAW
A man-a grown man-with one of those adorable Tokidoki bags. Seriously.
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
To take the force that the ground would exert on the egg upon impact(according to Newton's Third Law)
That title is an actual line from my lab report. If you're writing about eggs, all your sentences will be funny.Now all I need to do is to figure out how to relate all of my posts to eggs.(One down!)
Seen in the subway: Two astonishingly cute little girls in cute school uniforms(more of my opinions on that probably in my next post) playing with stuffed animals...and making machine gun noises. On the same subway ride, I saw an average guy in a suit talking to his equally average, suited, and male friend. I was trying to do homework, but I heard this phrase clearly:
"And then s/he(I can't remember which) picked up a stick and was like 'WHACK'!(making appropriate gesture)"
I don't know what they were talking about, but that was bloody awesome.
In other news: is Daughters of Eve sexist?
I mean, if it had been written by a man, that wouldn't even be a question for most people: Villainizing radical feminists(and feminists in general)+Anti-abortion, pro-saying a clump of cells that hasn't even truly formed yet is worthy of ruining most of your life prospects(like it did for Anne in the book) +Having in the ending 'Three years later...' bit, everyone be a housewife=Sexist. But, since it was written by a woman, we don't think of it like that. But is there something I'm missing? Please tell.
Seen in the subway: Two astonishingly cute little girls in cute school uniforms(more of my opinions on that probably in my next post) playing with stuffed animals...and making machine gun noises. On the same subway ride, I saw an average guy in a suit talking to his equally average, suited, and male friend. I was trying to do homework, but I heard this phrase clearly:
"And then s/he(I can't remember which) picked up a stick and was like 'WHACK'!(making appropriate gesture)"
I don't know what they were talking about, but that was bloody awesome.
In other news: is Daughters of Eve sexist?
I mean, if it had been written by a man, that wouldn't even be a question for most people: Villainizing radical feminists(and feminists in general)+Anti-abortion, pro-saying a clump of cells that hasn't even truly formed yet is worthy of ruining most of your life prospects(like it did for Anne in the book) +Having in the ending 'Three years later...' bit, everyone be a housewife=Sexist. But, since it was written by a woman, we don't think of it like that. But is there something I'm missing? Please tell.
Sunday, October 21, 2012
It Is Always Easy To Go Wrong With A Stopwatch
Hi! I'm now viewed as schizophrenic by everyone who was at Barnes and Nobles yesterday!
Really.
I know you want to know more, so! I will explain.
As everybody who reads this blog and has for a while knows, I am a fanatic CLAMP reader. I am particularly fond of Cardcaptor Sakura, and read it through omnibi. I saw the fourth omnibus at the store, and began to read.
Well.
I saw Sakura-chan crying. Now, I will not repeat the entire rant here, but I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU TAKING YOUR LIFE FRUSTRATIONS OUT ON ANY VERSION OF SAKURA-CHAN AGEHA OHKAWA. I wandered throughout the store, ranting and raving, and clutching a Magical Girl omnibus. At one point I pointed at a Warriors book and yelled "Shut the hell up!" There was a girl nearby, and I embarrassedly said "Sorry. Not you, ma'am." I finally decided on two Sakura-chan free books. I'm sorry, Sakura!
Really.
I know you want to know more, so! I will explain.
As everybody who reads this blog and has for a while knows, I am a fanatic CLAMP reader. I am particularly fond of Cardcaptor Sakura, and read it through omnibi. I saw the fourth omnibus at the store, and began to read.
Well.
I saw Sakura-chan crying. Now, I will not repeat the entire rant here, but I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU TAKING YOUR LIFE FRUSTRATIONS OUT ON ANY VERSION OF SAKURA-CHAN AGEHA OHKAWA. I wandered throughout the store, ranting and raving, and clutching a Magical Girl omnibus. At one point I pointed at a Warriors book and yelled "Shut the hell up!" There was a girl nearby, and I embarrassedly said "Sorry. Not you, ma'am." I finally decided on two Sakura-chan free books. I'm sorry, Sakura!
Monday, October 15, 2012
Cross-Dressing Macbeth
A note to two schools:
1. My middle school: FOR THE SAKE OF ALL THAT IS EVIL AND UNHOLY PUT SOME OF THOSE PAD/ TAMPON BOXES IN. For both the sake of those students on their periods and those not, as it is a little sad to see someone clutching a 'wad of toilet paper' to the trash can in semi-view of the hall and full view of everyone else in the bathroom.
2. The Lab School For Collaborative Studies: Get a better principal. Your current one reminds me of Sarah Palin.
IN HALLOWEEN NEWS:
I am torn between going as the space-time witch and going as Lady Macbeth. Melody is going as a Weeping Angel(not the uber-scary Stature of Liberty one in The Angels Take Manhattan, which we saw together on the tour), Momomouse is going as Hello Kitty, and Petronella is going as a zombie, just like every year. However, I went to the costume store and was filled with rage at how many sexy costumes there were. I was resigned at sexy stewardess, a bit confused at sexy firefighter, confused at sexy caveman, and flabbergasted at(I kid you not)sexy Tin Man. No lie.
Though hanging out with Melody was one of the only good things about the Lab School tour, I also saw this ad:
1. My middle school: FOR THE SAKE OF ALL THAT IS EVIL AND UNHOLY PUT SOME OF THOSE PAD/ TAMPON BOXES IN. For both the sake of those students on their periods and those not, as it is a little sad to see someone clutching a 'wad of toilet paper' to the trash can in semi-view of the hall and full view of everyone else in the bathroom.
2. The Lab School For Collaborative Studies: Get a better principal. Your current one reminds me of Sarah Palin.
IN HALLOWEEN NEWS:
I am torn between going as the space-time witch and going as Lady Macbeth. Melody is going as a Weeping Angel(not the uber-scary Stature of Liberty one in The Angels Take Manhattan, which we saw together on the tour), Momomouse is going as Hello Kitty, and Petronella is going as a zombie, just like every year. However, I went to the costume store and was filled with rage at how many sexy costumes there were. I was resigned at sexy stewardess, a bit confused at sexy firefighter, confused at sexy caveman, and flabbergasted at(I kid you not)sexy Tin Man. No lie.
Though hanging out with Melody was one of the only good things about the Lab School tour, I also saw this ad:
OH. MY. GOD. Is it or is it not the greatest pawn shop ad you have ever seen? You may not be able to see this, but the chameleon's briefcase says 'Mr. Bling.' And he is wearing a tie! Notice that the chameleon's money is chameleon-size, but not the giant ring. And why is he a chameleon? And the caption above says 'Get more Cha-Ching for your Bling Bling'. It is just so surreal(Sorry about the weird formatting.)
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Demonic Cat
I am Sick. Sick unto death. Forgive me, I recently discovered Slings and Arrows. You must watch it if you are obsessed with Shakespeare's plays, like me. However, what with me being semi-delirious, I found this extraordinarily funny:
As the brilliant Ms. Smartypants said on her blog-->
OY GEVALT!!!!!
Be the 60,000 Customer to Order a Fried Whitefish Sandwich
and Receive 10 Free Fried Whitefish Sandwiches!
Sunday, October 7, 2012
I'm Going...To Write A Blog Post
The three greatest lines in Tsubasa (my point of view)
1. Then my type is the one you hate the most(Volume 6). (He said that so happily while in a life-threatening situation...)
2. And if my enemy lives or dies in the process, it's not my worry!(Volume 1) (I have a habit of saying this before a test)
3. I'm going...to teach myself how to react to unseen attacks on both sides.(Volume 6) (Said very heroicly, directly after another character said the same thing. I say that a lot now: ''I'm going...to tour the high school." "I'm going...to play Sims.")
I'M GOING...TO TALK ABOUT MY SLEEPOVER WITH PETRONELLA.
We watched the video for Gangnam Style, and I could not see what the fuss was about. Was it because it's funny? Eminem's videos are way better. Including the one with the Muppets. Then, we had this in a story we were telling.
CREEPY MONSTER: Come with me...
HALF-ASLEEP GUY: No, I can't, I'm supposed to keep watch.
5 minutes later
H-AG: GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
I don't know if this is funny to you as well, but it stops being funny for me at 11:30 when the lights are out(curse you 10:00 bedtime).
I'm going...to stop ranting now.
1. Then my type is the one you hate the most(Volume 6). (He said that so happily while in a life-threatening situation...)
2. And if my enemy lives or dies in the process, it's not my worry!(Volume 1) (I have a habit of saying this before a test)
3. I'm going...to teach myself how to react to unseen attacks on both sides.(Volume 6) (Said very heroicly, directly after another character said the same thing. I say that a lot now: ''I'm going...to tour the high school." "I'm going...to play Sims.")
I'M GOING...TO TALK ABOUT MY SLEEPOVER WITH PETRONELLA.
We watched the video for Gangnam Style, and I could not see what the fuss was about. Was it because it's funny? Eminem's videos are way better. Including the one with the Muppets. Then, we had this in a story we were telling.
CREEPY MONSTER: Come with me...
HALF-ASLEEP GUY: No, I can't, I'm supposed to keep watch.
5 minutes later
H-AG: GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
I don't know if this is funny to you as well, but it stops being funny for me at 11:30 when the lights are out(curse you 10:00 bedtime).
I'm going...to stop ranting now.
Thursday, October 4, 2012
WHY GOD WHY
IT HAPPENED AGAIN.I had someone search that again.
FOOLPROOF WAY FOR WARDING OFF ANNOYING PEOPLE
Impersonate Kuro-rii! Be all grumpy and straight man! Of course, don't take out a sword and slice them into sushi. Unless they're really annoying.
FOOLPROOF WAY FOR WARDING OFF ANNOYING PEOPLE
Impersonate Kuro-rii! Be all grumpy and straight man! Of course, don't take out a sword and slice them into sushi. Unless they're really annoying.
Friday, September 28, 2012
Truly, My Name Is Slim Shady
Look at this! It. Is. Awesome.
Just so ya know...
Mom got a shipment of books for me and Chestnut to read/her to review for her blog. I will review all of them I feel are worth it.
Also awesome: The Moonrise Kingdom soundtrack. It's on Rhapsody, and YOU MUST LISTEN to part 7. It is so beautiful.
Also awesome: Reading Animal Farm for Humanities. Completely awesome so far. Also, my teacher has this wonderful color-coding for genre thing that is a lifesaver for a genre nut like me.
Also awesome: Book based on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She is cool, but she will not change the burning hatred I feel for Seishiro from Tsubasa.
Hey, did I just mention Animal Farm and Tsubasa in the same post? I WIN.
Just so ya know...
Mom got a shipment of books for me and Chestnut to read/her to review for her blog. I will review all of them I feel are worth it.
Also awesome: The Moonrise Kingdom soundtrack. It's on Rhapsody, and YOU MUST LISTEN to part 7. It is so beautiful.
Also awesome: Reading Animal Farm for Humanities. Completely awesome so far. Also, my teacher has this wonderful color-coding for genre thing that is a lifesaver for a genre nut like me.
Also awesome: Book based on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She is cool, but she will not change the burning hatred I feel for Seishiro from Tsubasa.
Hey, did I just mention Animal Farm and Tsubasa in the same post? I WIN.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Planet Of Ruin(Kyaaaa!)
I just remembered this:
Once, me and Petronella were really into the show iCarly. We loooooooved it. Then, we decided to make our own webshow. It was called Billy-Bert(not it's real name). We played Billy-Bert and Chibiusa(again, psuedonyms for the psuedonyms). The thing is, it's on YouTube still. It was so dumb. We shoved everything into a pot and cooked once. I played the straight man, and she the funny man.
WEIRD THING 1
Petronella looked like a guy! I mean, now she has long hair and is rather...endowed in certain areas, bu then she looked very male. Androgynous. Like Haruka Ten'o! Only she doesn't have the mystical ability to turn into a man.
WEIRD THING 2
No one ever watched it...I feel so sad.
Once, me and Petronella were really into the show iCarly. We loooooooved it. Then, we decided to make our own webshow. It was called Billy-Bert(not it's real name). We played Billy-Bert and Chibiusa(again, psuedonyms for the psuedonyms). The thing is, it's on YouTube still. It was so dumb. We shoved everything into a pot and cooked once. I played the straight man, and she the funny man.
WEIRD THING 1
Petronella looked like a guy! I mean, now she has long hair and is rather...endowed in certain areas, bu then she looked very male. Androgynous. Like Haruka Ten'o! Only she doesn't have the mystical ability to turn into a man.
WEIRD THING 2
No one ever watched it...I feel so sad.
Monday, September 17, 2012
The Cat's Here
I have just seen something that made me scream WHY GOD WHY. I like to see what people search to get here. Now, most people search for 'darkness engulfs us'. I got this result today:'dirty fairy tales names'.
WHY? WHY WOULD YOU SEARCH SUCH A THING?
WHY? WHY WOULD YOU SEARCH SUCH A THING?
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Literary Addiction
Hooray! My neighborhood library has reopened and they have EVERY SINGLE XXXHOLIC BOOK!! YAAY! I wanted to put a video on my blog, but I can't really do that, but if you want to see a really disturbing battery commercial, search up USB cells bunnies on Youtube. It is like a parody, but it may give you nightmares. Seriously. It has bunnies with human mouths. Nightmares. God I love that song. I also love the song Eleanor Rigby, which proves that I adore me some depressing British rock music.
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Tick Tock
Math class never ceases to amaze me. I have heard another weird thing:
Two guys at my table are talking about about a video game.
Guy #1: Hmm...some kind of treasure...like King Arthur's sword*?
Guy #2: No way, man, that's totally gay.
... .
*Excalibur. Referred to in The Secrets Of The Immortal Nicholas Flamel as the sword of ice, which may be a reference to the element of water. A fixture in many legends. Referred to by Momomouse as Gangscalibur. Don't ask.
Two guys at my table are talking about about a video game.
Guy #1: Hmm...some kind of treasure...like King Arthur's sword*?
Guy #2: No way, man, that's totally gay.
... .
*Excalibur. Referred to in The Secrets Of The Immortal Nicholas Flamel as the sword of ice, which may be a reference to the element of water. A fixture in many legends. Referred to by Momomouse as Gangscalibur. Don't ask.
The Skull And The Octopus
JUST BECAUSE...
Books I Love
1.On The Day I Died,Candice Fleming(Read. This. Book.)
2. Midnighters, Scott Westerfield(Amazingly sci-fi-y while still being fantasy enough for me)
3.Beauty Queens, Libba Bray.(So damn funny)
4.The Soldiers Of Halla, D.J. MacHale(He brought my favorite character back to life, and she gets a huge role in this book.
I need to stop this list now, to explain about Kasha. She was a cat...a alien panther with ninja skills. Who can resist the alien panthers with ninja skills? If you aren't obsessed with black cats, ninjas, and sci-fi like me, perhaps you. She was my absolute favorite character in Pendragon. Then, she died in a rockfall. Skip forward a few months. I have finished the Warriors series 3(I hate that series, for reasons detailed here.). Hollyleaf, another awesome black cat with ninja skills, has died. In a rockfall. Skip forward another few months. I am feeling very depressed, due to something I cannot remember. Then, I realize: There is a literary conspiracy against awesome black cats. I was outraged, snapped out of my depression, and began making posters.
I'm sorry if I made you question my sanity.
Books I Love
1.On The Day I Died,Candice Fleming(Read. This. Book.)
2. Midnighters, Scott Westerfield(Amazingly sci-fi-y while still being fantasy enough for me)
3.Beauty Queens, Libba Bray.(So damn funny)
4.The Soldiers Of Halla, D.J. MacHale(He brought my favorite character back to life, and she gets a huge role in this book.
I need to stop this list now, to explain about Kasha. She was a cat...a alien panther with ninja skills. Who can resist the alien panthers with ninja skills? If you aren't obsessed with black cats, ninjas, and sci-fi like me, perhaps you. She was my absolute favorite character in Pendragon. Then, she died in a rockfall. Skip forward a few months. I have finished the Warriors series 3(I hate that series, for reasons detailed here.). Hollyleaf, another awesome black cat with ninja skills, has died. In a rockfall. Skip forward another few months. I am feeling very depressed, due to something I cannot remember. Then, I realize: There is a literary conspiracy against awesome black cats. I was outraged, snapped out of my depression, and began making posters.
I'm sorry if I made you question my sanity.
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Too Many Grapes
Awesome lines of dialogue and spell names in manga
La lac lic lac lilac!
Tuxedo la smoking bomber! ( I KNOW)
Rock-Buster The Conqueror!
NOW LET'S SEE THAT AGAIN
Tuxedo la smoking bomber!
I buried a crystal in my body and now I can slay dragons!
MY EAAAAAAAAARSSS!!!!!!!!!!!
Stop saying creepy things! You're going to give me nightmares!
PUNCH!
Angel's dead too? Angel: I'm not dead
I WILL KILL YOU ALL! Other Guy: She's been like this for a while.
Don't go killing me without asking!
Tuxedo la smoking bomber!(sorry)
I have to dig the crystal out of his body!
MONEY! MONEY! MONEY! MOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEE
This doesn't look like a vampires room at all!
Tuxedo la smoking bomber!
DR. WHO LINES THAT ARE ALSO AWESOME
This is not going to be high on dignity!
You just saved the world from aliens. Deathy aliens. Aliens of death. And now you want to bring them back?
We should be safe. Rory hasn't died yet.
Am I the only one wondering where she got the milk?
La lac lic lac lilac!
Tuxedo la smoking bomber! ( I KNOW)
Rock-Buster The Conqueror!
NOW LET'S SEE THAT AGAIN
Tuxedo la smoking bomber!
I buried a crystal in my body and now I can slay dragons!
MY EAAAAAAAAARSSS!!!!!!!!!!!
Stop saying creepy things! You're going to give me nightmares!
PUNCH!
Angel's dead too? Angel: I'm not dead
I WILL KILL YOU ALL! Other Guy: She's been like this for a while.
Don't go killing me without asking!
Tuxedo la smoking bomber!(sorry)
I have to dig the crystal out of his body!
MONEY! MONEY! MONEY! MOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEE
This doesn't look like a vampires room at all!
Tuxedo la smoking bomber!
DR. WHO LINES THAT ARE ALSO AWESOME
This is not going to be high on dignity!
You just saved the world from aliens. Deathy aliens. Aliens of death. And now you want to bring them back?
We should be safe. Rory hasn't died yet.
Am I the only one wondering where she got the milk?
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
With Dragons
I just remembered: I had the best dream last night. I dreamed I had magic powers and was sent to this place where I trained my powers. I always wanted to have magic , and that dream was just amazing because of that.
Don't Poke Me With A Needle
I have made up a psuedo-Irish-Japanese tune that I keep humming, and it reminds me of Spirited Away for some reason(which I saw, but DID NOT LIKE)*sound of every fan fainting in horror because I do not like Spirited Away. Dude, I was shocked that I didn't like Spirited Away* However, I did like My Neighbor Totoro and Princess Mononoke. Of course, Momomouse loves everything by Hayao Miyazaki, but her all time favorite is Castle In The Sky. Melody loves Spirited Away, and Petronella hasn't told me her feelings on Miyazaki-san's movies.
UPDATE: I actually do like Spirited Away, but I prefer Princess Mononoke.
UPDATE: I actually do like Spirited Away, but I prefer Princess Mononoke.
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Snipers and Snakes
Belated...
MY OPINION OF THE SAILOR GUARDIANS
1. Usagi Tsukino, Sailor Moon: Yech. Cute, but I have an aversion to Magical Girl main characters. Plus, she is a wimp.
2. Ami Mizuno, Sailor Mercury: SOOOOOOOO CUUUUUUUUTE! She is so dorky in such a cuuuuute way. I have the urge to hug her and say 'It's okay for you to be so nerdy...you're awesome and cute, and being a nerd is cool anyway.'
3. Rei Hino, Sailor Mars: So damn gorgeous. She is ridiculously pretty, not to mention awesome.
4. Makoto Kino, Sailor Jupiter: Yech. I just dislike her.
5. Minako Aino, Sailor Venus: Pretty and funny. She's okay.
6. Chibiusa Tsukino, Sailor Chibi Moon:Eh.
7. Haruka Ten'o, Sailor Uranus: Aside from the apostrophe in her name, s/he is just odd.
8. Michiru Kaio, Sailor Neptune: AWESOME! Pretty, twisted, and a violinist? Yaaaaaay!
9. Setsuna Meio, Sailor Pluto: Pretty cool, plus she looks like Mana Tatsumiya.
10. Hotaru Tomoe, Sailor Saturn: SO DAMN AWESOME. She can wear cool lace-up goth-ish boots with her magical girl uniform, and not just look okay, but look awesome. My favorite.
However, Haruka has the coolest name. TEN'O! SHE HAS AN APOSTROPHE!
Oh, wait: 11. Sailor Chibichibi: I haven't seen her in action, but she is freakishly deformed.
MY OPINION OF THE SAILOR GUARDIANS
1. Usagi Tsukino, Sailor Moon: Yech. Cute, but I have an aversion to Magical Girl main characters. Plus, she is a wimp.
2. Ami Mizuno, Sailor Mercury: SOOOOOOOO CUUUUUUUUTE! She is so dorky in such a cuuuuute way. I have the urge to hug her and say 'It's okay for you to be so nerdy...you're awesome and cute, and being a nerd is cool anyway.'
3. Rei Hino, Sailor Mars: So damn gorgeous. She is ridiculously pretty, not to mention awesome.
4. Makoto Kino, Sailor Jupiter: Yech. I just dislike her.
5. Minako Aino, Sailor Venus: Pretty and funny. She's okay.
6. Chibiusa Tsukino, Sailor Chibi Moon:Eh.
7. Haruka Ten'o, Sailor Uranus: Aside from the apostrophe in her name, s/he is just odd.
8. Michiru Kaio, Sailor Neptune: AWESOME! Pretty, twisted, and a violinist? Yaaaaaay!
9. Setsuna Meio, Sailor Pluto: Pretty cool, plus she looks like Mana Tatsumiya.
10. Hotaru Tomoe, Sailor Saturn: SO DAMN AWESOME. She can wear cool lace-up goth-ish boots with her magical girl uniform, and not just look okay, but look awesome. My favorite.
However, Haruka has the coolest name. TEN'O! SHE HAS AN APOSTROPHE!
Oh, wait: 11. Sailor Chibichibi: I haven't seen her in action, but she is freakishly deformed.
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Help! Chipmunk!
I am feeling rather rageful. I read the interview with the governor of Arizona in the New York Times Magazine, and here are my reactions.
Question 1:Obama...is thin-skinned...Right. So possible for a president! Because they are critiqued 1000 times a day!
Question 2: Way to avoid answering the question, Ms. Brewer!
Question 3: Yes! Statistics are all lies! Because the truth is a lie! A place an hours drive at a mile a minute from the border of your state is part of your state! SOOOOOOO TRUE!
Question 4: How is this answer relevant? At all?
Question 5: In my search for the interview, I heard that this man said being compared to the Ku Klux Klan was a honor. AND THIS WOMAN SUPPORTS HIM!
Question 6: Yes, laws aren't the governor's responsibility. Way to shift the blame.
Question 7: Because God knows that it's a great idea to give everyone guns and not rescind the privilege when they start shooting people.
Question 8: Right! Drunk people+guns=everybody's safe!
Question 9: No matter how small the percentage is, drunks with concealed weapons are dangerous. That's all there is to say.
Questions 10 and 11: No comment.
Question 12: HOLY SHIT. So, you are going to change a law so your OWN @$%@ING SON GOES TO @$*%^@@%&%ING JAIL?
Questions 13 and 14: I have officially lost all faith in the human race.
Question 1:Obama...is thin-skinned...Right. So possible for a president! Because they are critiqued 1000 times a day!
Question 2: Way to avoid answering the question, Ms. Brewer!
Question 3: Yes! Statistics are all lies! Because the truth is a lie! A place an hours drive at a mile a minute from the border of your state is part of your state! SOOOOOOO TRUE!
Question 4: How is this answer relevant? At all?
Question 5: In my search for the interview, I heard that this man said being compared to the Ku Klux Klan was a honor. AND THIS WOMAN SUPPORTS HIM!
Question 6: Yes, laws aren't the governor's responsibility. Way to shift the blame.
Question 7: Because God knows that it's a great idea to give everyone guns and not rescind the privilege when they start shooting people.
Question 8: Right! Drunk people+guns=everybody's safe!
Question 9: No matter how small the percentage is, drunks with concealed weapons are dangerous. That's all there is to say.
Questions 10 and 11: No comment.
Question 12: HOLY SHIT. So, you are going to change a law so your OWN @$%@ING SON GOES TO @$*%^@@%&%ING JAIL?
Questions 13 and 14: I have officially lost all faith in the human race.
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Wolf Happened Because Of The Necktie
I am bored. Thus, I am writing this post.
I'll post something funny here later.
WAIT! Did you know that one of the people who was killed during the Salem Witch Trials(which I am OBSESSED with) was a five-year old girl? It's insane. Apparently, she couldn't even understand anything happening, but the girls who were faking being bewitched said she was, so she was arrested. Another time there, a man said his wife wasn't a witch, and he was arrested too.
Okay, enough Tsubasa-Volume-19 depressingness, I have to leave.
I'll post something funny here later.
WAIT! Did you know that one of the people who was killed during the Salem Witch Trials(which I am OBSESSED with) was a five-year old girl? It's insane. Apparently, she couldn't even understand anything happening, but the girls who were faking being bewitched said she was, so she was arrested. Another time there, a man said his wife wasn't a witch, and he was arrested too.
Okay, enough Tsubasa-Volume-19 depressingness, I have to leave.
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
And The Bunny Ears
Sorry for not posting in a while, busy reading manga and sitting around the house. Right now I am vacationing in a very nice house in Cape Cod. Behold, what you thought had stopped:
FOOD I LOVE
1. My mom's homemade brownies.
2. Crappy boxed macaroni and cheese.
3. Chocolate bars(only plain chocolate)
4. Sweet Italian sausage.
5. Pizza.
6. Cake.
7. Toast.
8. Chocolate eclairs.
9.These chickpeas.
10.Well-buttered pasta.
11. Lasagna.
12. Hot cocoa.
13. Spareribs.
You can never escape the Wednesday Pointless List. Like a zombie in a Romero movie, it will track you down and eat your mind.
FOOD I LOVE
1. My mom's homemade brownies.
2. Crappy boxed macaroni and cheese.
3. Chocolate bars(only plain chocolate)
4. Sweet Italian sausage.
5. Pizza.
6. Cake.
7. Toast.
8. Chocolate eclairs.
9.These chickpeas.
10.Well-buttered pasta.
11. Lasagna.
12. Hot cocoa.
13. Spareribs.
You can never escape the Wednesday Pointless List. Like a zombie in a Romero movie, it will track you down and eat your mind.
Monday, August 13, 2012
I Am A Terrible Person
Okay, I was planning on posting about the Olympics closing ceremony, but I was reading a blog I like, and I came across this. Here is a catalogue of my thoughts from that point:
1. If Netflix does that to me, I will show them a picture of Fai's SCARY PSYCHO FACE from volume 19 of Tsubasa. Heheheheh, that'll be fun.
2. Did I just laugh about that? OH GOD, I AM A TERRIBLE PERSON.
3. I mean, normally this scene makes me feel sad for Fai and Syaoran, and full of rage and hate for Fei-Wang Reed, but I just laughed.
4. What even happened in that scene? (Still not 100% sure on that one)
5. That's what's gonna happen to the Doctor if Amy dies! She'll probably die in Season 7, after all.
6. HOLY SHIT, THAT COULD ACTUALLY HAPPEN. THAT COULD ACTUALLY HAPPEN. THE DOCTOR COULD @%&*$(@&(censored for spoilers). OH NO. OH NO. OH NO.
7. *SCARY PSYCHO TSUBASA VOLUME 19 FACE*
See! It all comes full circle! By the way, sorry for the relevant title.
1. If Netflix does that to me, I will show them a picture of Fai's SCARY PSYCHO FACE from volume 19 of Tsubasa. Heheheheh, that'll be fun.
2. Did I just laugh about that? OH GOD, I AM A TERRIBLE PERSON.
3. I mean, normally this scene makes me feel sad for Fai and Syaoran, and full of rage and hate for Fei-Wang Reed, but I just laughed.
4. What even happened in that scene? (Still not 100% sure on that one)
5. That's what's gonna happen to the Doctor if Amy dies! She'll probably die in Season 7, after all.
6. HOLY SHIT, THAT COULD ACTUALLY HAPPEN. THAT COULD ACTUALLY HAPPEN. THE DOCTOR COULD @%&*$(@&(censored for spoilers). OH NO. OH NO. OH NO.
7. *SCARY PSYCHO TSUBASA VOLUME 19 FACE*
See! It all comes full circle! By the way, sorry for the relevant title.
Thursday, August 9, 2012
Cute Anime Octopi
I am writing a short story for camp, and the guy right next to me just used the phrase 'by the force of the lion'. I didn't see much else, but BY THE FORCE OF THE LION! That is so my new curse word.
My camp has several recreational activities, and I have discovered that cross-stich embroidery is populated by female Harry Potter nerds only. Half of the embroiderers were stitching the symbol of the Deathly Hallows, the other 2 were stitching flowers. Me? I was stitching Chi from Chobits.
Other great lines from the guy sitting next to me's story:
The lion stands up and realizes him.(What the hell IS this?!
It swings its claws, which destroyed his leg.(You've got your tenses confused there...)
He then sticks out his sword.(Such dirty connotations, hehehehehe)
He then beats his head with his shield for quite a long time.(Is he okay? )
Stinging as hell, he stood up and tried running (What? What?)
In order from the top, this makes a surrealist fight scene.
UPDATE: Most of these have been fixed, but...'He stopped the bleeding by ripping off a part of his torso' is the latest awesome mistake.However, it's a cool story now I have read it. He's also only 10, so I can't judge him as if he were older.
My camp has several recreational activities, and I have discovered that cross-stich embroidery is populated by female Harry Potter nerds only. Half of the embroiderers were stitching the symbol of the Deathly Hallows, the other 2 were stitching flowers. Me? I was stitching Chi from Chobits.
Other great lines from the guy sitting next to me's story:
The lion stands up and realizes him.(What the hell IS this?!
It swings its claws, which destroyed his leg.(You've got your tenses confused there...)
He then sticks out his sword.(Such dirty connotations, hehehehehe)
He then beats his head with his shield for quite a long time.(Is he okay? )
Stinging as hell, he stood up and tried running (What? What?)
In order from the top, this makes a surrealist fight scene.
UPDATE: Most of these have been fixed, but...'He stopped the bleeding by ripping off a part of his torso' is the latest awesome mistake.However, it's a cool story now I have read it. He's also only 10, so I can't judge him as if he were older.
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Mercutio Was The Only Decent Thing
Interesting and potentially alarming information: I have forgotten how to wave. I don't mean I'm being more of a loner than usual, I mean I DON"T KNOW THE SEQUENCE OF MOVEMENTS FOR A WAVE ANYMORE.
I finally read Chobits and found it rather captivating.
I am having insomnia because of my roommate's scary snores. Worse than usual insomnia. As in, she's fast asleep and I'm thinking HOLY SHIT WEEPING ANGELS ARE GOING TO KILL ME because of her freaky snores. Hey, roommate? Quiet down on the rasping growl of a serial killer or monster snores. This goes to my fan too. Just because you are on high does not mean you need to make your creepy clicking sound.
I finally read Chobits and found it rather captivating.
I am having insomnia because of my roommate's scary snores. Worse than usual insomnia. As in, she's fast asleep and I'm thinking HOLY SHIT WEEPING ANGELS ARE GOING TO KILL ME because of her freaky snores. Hey, roommate? Quiet down on the rasping growl of a serial killer or monster snores. This goes to my fan too. Just because you are on high does not mean you need to make your creepy clicking sound.
Thursday, August 2, 2012
Not Enough To Sharpie
During camp, we are working on scripts via computers. I finished, so I'm posting. Now, listen to-
THE WEIRDEST DREAM I EVER HAD. FOR REAL.
All I remember is that Kuro-poppo was eating miso soup and everyone was really surprised. What was really weird was that IT WAS IN COMIC FORM, and the bit where everyone(not sure who they were) was shocked was when he said that it was 'kinda good'. I must agree, but I think I've gone crazy-crazier.
THE WEIRDEST DREAM I EVER HAD. FOR REAL.
All I remember is that Kuro-poppo was eating miso soup and everyone was really surprised. What was really weird was that IT WAS IN COMIC FORM, and the bit where everyone(not sure who they were) was shocked was when he said that it was 'kinda good'. I must agree, but I think I've gone crazy-crazier.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Roulette for Infinity
Two things that you didn't know about me:
I know a few Old Norse runes and can draw them on you, including Thuris, Thor's rune.
I am making a Tsubasa-themed mix tape and will, if you ask, give you the list of songs. All I will divulge for now is that it features a lot of Doctor Who themed songs, and the song for Kuronkichi's country is Mockingbird, by Eminem.
I just read Beauty Queens, and I found it excellent. Truly superior. Epic. IT RULED.
I read Tsubasa volume 19 as phase one of Top Secret Project F, and found it epic, but it's gotten very depressing recently. However, it still ruled magnificently.
I'll be going to sleepaway camp soon, so I might not post for a while.
Until then...
Thursday, July 19, 2012
And A Bow And Arrow To Complete It
After not posting in a while, our hero returns...
I have a complaint... two, in fact.My three complaints are:
This is a stall that opened up directly near our local supermarket that sells low fat/calorie/sugar gelato. LOW FAT GELATO! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME SUPERMARKET? DID I KILL YOUR FAMILY OR SOMETHING?
I was allowed money for an excursion to the bookstore to buy my summer reading assignment, but not the latest Artemis Fowl book.
I have lost reading time to feed my neighbors cats, and they have not delivered payment. I WILL TURN INTO THE TIME SPACE WITCH AND KILL YOU FOR NOT PAYING ME A FAIR PRICE NEIGHBORS! KILL YOU!
I have a complaint... two, in fact.My three complaints are:
This is a stall that opened up directly near our local supermarket that sells low fat/calorie/sugar gelato. LOW FAT GELATO! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME SUPERMARKET? DID I KILL YOUR FAMILY OR SOMETHING?
I was allowed money for an excursion to the bookstore to buy my summer reading assignment, but not the latest Artemis Fowl book.
I have lost reading time to feed my neighbors cats, and they have not delivered payment. I WILL TURN INTO THE TIME SPACE WITCH AND KILL YOU FOR NOT PAYING ME A FAIR PRICE NEIGHBORS! KILL YOU!
Friday, July 13, 2012
He Regularly Delivers Fisticuffs
WOOHOO! My sister and mother have gone off, so me and my father are staying at home. As we are very similar, we will probably not get much done. Meanwhile, I am proud to deliver you... the Necrogirl Scale Of Battle Strength.
Could Win Against Kuro-ron:
Could Win Against Sakura Kinomoto:
Could Win Against Sailor Moon:
Could Win Against Lana from Gone:
Could Win Against Emily Strange:
Not many make it to the top. Where do YOUR favorite literary characters rate?
TGIF13(Thank God It's Friday The 13th)
Could Win Against Kuro-ron:
Could Win Against Sakura Kinomoto:
Could Win Against Sailor Moon:
Could Win Against Lana from Gone:
Could Win Against Emily Strange:
Not many make it to the top. Where do YOUR favorite literary characters rate?
TGIF13(Thank God It's Friday The 13th)
Monday, July 9, 2012
The Vampire Looked Like Yuki From Fruits Basket
Now, when did I last post? I cannot remember due to the fact that IT'S SUMMER WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I have been composing epic horror musicals, drawing, chatting with Melody about the most disturbing things we've read, hanging with my cousin, who I will refer to as Eona, and forcing her to read Tsubasa, reading, and hearing Melody rant about art in between these posts.
SOME INTERESTING THINGS ABOUT MY SUMMER CAMP
There is a counselor who was wearing a shirt that said 'The days of this society is numbered.' Every time I look at him, I have to say "I agree with the sentiment, but use decent grammar!" because of my grammar OCD. If I didn't agree with the sentiment, I would say "This society are able to continue.", but that would make me sound like a black person in one of those books like The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn.
SOME INTERESTING THINGS ABOUT MY SUMMER CAMP
There is a counselor who was wearing a shirt that said 'The days of this society is numbered.' Every time I look at him, I have to say "I agree with the sentiment, but use decent grammar!" because of my grammar OCD. If I didn't agree with the sentiment, I would say "This society are able to continue.", but that would make me sound like a black person in one of those books like The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
The Space-Time Witch Is A Completely Different Thing
There comes a time in every bloggers' life when:
A. They get an amount of viewers that is of a most delightful number. 666 VIEWERS, SO BRING ON THE FOUR HORSEMEN, Y'ALL.
B. They hear a Care Bear book being read aloud and fall over themselves with gleeful mirth. It's so horrible, it's hilarious. Whenever I see my young cousin holding that book, I run into that room so as to overhear(At the moment, I'm in Vermont with my dad's family).
C. They find a book at a community book sale and are struck by its awe-inspiring(if you can call it that, but there is no other word to describe HOW MASSIVE this was) sexism. It was entitled The Alphabet Of Manliness, and it was horrific. There was a ridiculous number of Animorphs books, but nothing decent.
A. They get an amount of viewers that is of a most delightful number. 666 VIEWERS, SO BRING ON THE FOUR HORSEMEN, Y'ALL.
B. They hear a Care Bear book being read aloud and fall over themselves with gleeful mirth. It's so horrible, it's hilarious. Whenever I see my young cousin holding that book, I run into that room so as to overhear(At the moment, I'm in Vermont with my dad's family).
C. They find a book at a community book sale and are struck by its awe-inspiring(if you can call it that, but there is no other word to describe HOW MASSIVE this was) sexism. It was entitled The Alphabet Of Manliness, and it was horrific. There was a ridiculous number of Animorphs books, but nothing decent.
Saturday, June 30, 2012
The Best Ever Time To Quote Hamlet
(I have just decided to title my posts from random things I've said around this time)
So, I went to the Botanic Garden with my Doctor Who obsessed friend Melody, and we talked on things strange and mysterious, and listened to the Nyan Cat song, which I will not link to here for your continued sanity. But the conversation turned, as it always does, to Tsubasa, and the similarities between Fai and the Doctor, which led to this exchange:
ME: You know, they're both really emo.
MELODY: Yes! They totally are!
When you end up talking about how emo the Doctor is, you feel both happy and sad. Speaking of Tsubasa, I feel people should always type manga in odd fonts, because of this almost typo-
In Volume 4, Kiishim says "You have made yourself comfortable, shutting yourself inside my castle, have you not?"
Since it's all in a strange font and all caps, here's what I see:
"You have made yourself comfortable, shitting yourself inside my castle, have you not?"
This is the best misreading in the universe.
So, I went to the Botanic Garden with my Doctor Who obsessed friend Melody, and we talked on things strange and mysterious, and listened to the Nyan Cat song, which I will not link to here for your continued sanity. But the conversation turned, as it always does, to Tsubasa, and the similarities between Fai and the Doctor, which led to this exchange:
ME: You know, they're both really emo.
MELODY: Yes! They totally are!
When you end up talking about how emo the Doctor is, you feel both happy and sad. Speaking of Tsubasa, I feel people should always type manga in odd fonts, because of this almost typo-
In Volume 4, Kiishim says "You have made yourself comfortable, shutting yourself inside my castle, have you not?"
Since it's all in a strange font and all caps, here's what I see:
"You have made yourself comfortable, shitting yourself inside my castle, have you not?"
This is the best misreading in the universe.
Friday, June 22, 2012
As The Grandma Says, So Shall It Be
My grandmother told me to write the story of Chestnut's graduation on my blog. I didn't think it was so funny, but Grandma told me to, so the hel with it.
Here goes:
Me and Petronella(like in that post, I can't remember her blog URL) were sitting together, and she was videotaping the whole thing. First, we all had to pledge allegiance (I didn't. Necrogirl, dangerous anarchist on the loose!) while the school choir sang 'The Star Spangled Banner'. Then there were two speakers- an Olympic luge player who was commercially produced plastic baloney and a football player for the New York Giants who, strangely enough, had his own clothing line. I'm too hot to write any more, sorry. Not even if you beg.
Here goes:
Me and Petronella(like in that post, I can't remember her blog URL) were sitting together, and she was videotaping the whole thing. First, we all had to pledge allegiance (I didn't. Necrogirl, dangerous anarchist on the loose!) while the school choir sang 'The Star Spangled Banner'. Then there were two speakers- an Olympic luge player who was commercially produced plastic baloney and a football player for the New York Giants who, strangely enough, had his own clothing line. I'm too hot to write any more, sorry. Not even if you beg.
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
It's Norse Mythology Week! I Just Made That Up!
I suppose you are all wondering where the hel I have been. I have been reading Runemarks(Oh my, that book is so good I may buy a copy), making a school-fantasy manga(you just have to sometimes), and making up a new holiday! It is Norse Mythology week now, and will be until next Wednesday, so go out and say 'hel' as many gratuitous times as you want! Watch Thor! Read The Children of Odin and Runemarks! What the hel! It's Norse mythology week!
Sunday, June 17, 2012
This Post Has No Narrative Structure...But It Has Eyeball Gouging!
I went to the library, and took out two books in which eyeballs were gouged and eaten. One of the gouging and eating of eyeballs situations was a HUGE plot event, so I won't say how it happened, who had his eye gouged out, or who ate the eyeball after gouging it out. The other was just an offhand mention. Why would you mention that as an offhand mention? That's just odd.
Thursday, June 14, 2012
A Midsummer Night's Nightmare
Hello, and welcome to Fictional Shakespeare, where fictional characters act out great works of literature. Today, we are doing A Midsummer Night's Dream. Emily the Strange will be Titania, Kurogane will be Oberon, and Tomoyo and Yukito will be directing.
Kurogane: Do we need to do this?
Tomoyo: Yes, or else I will be very angry at you.
Kurogane: Um...
Emily: Ick. This is why I dislike humans.
Kurogane: What's she here for?
Emily: Aren't we supposed to start speaking our lines?
Kurogane: Fine. Well met by moonight, proud Titania-What the hell is this? It's totally gay.
Yukito: So...all ninjas are homophobic.
Kurogane: Wha? How many ninjas have you met?
Yukito: Naruto's homophobic.
Emily: Can't argue with that.
Tomoyo: Ninjas are very homophobic...
Kurogane: Don't judge ninjas based on Naruto! He's a damn brat!
Tomoyo: Yes, he has no appreciation for fashion.
Yukito: Aren't we supposed to be acting?
Kurogane: Shut up! You're such a pain!
Tomoyo: I noticed you have not denied the accusations of homophobia.
Kurogane: And?
Tomoyo: You wouldn't just be holding back on the homophobia because you have a crush on me, would you?
Kurogane:Uh...
Kurogane runs away.
Tomoyo: Ho ho ho.
Emily: You have a messed up laugh.
Yukito: I think Kurogane is homophobic.
Tomoyo: I don't, I just enjoy making him run away.
Yukito: You are a terrible human being.
Tomoyo: Yes, I enjoy being one.
Emily: So do I.
Kurogane: Do we need to do this?
Tomoyo: Yes, or else I will be very angry at you.
Kurogane: Um...
Emily: Ick. This is why I dislike humans.
Kurogane: What's she here for?
Emily: Aren't we supposed to start speaking our lines?
Kurogane: Fine. Well met by moonight, proud Titania-What the hell is this? It's totally gay.
Yukito: So...all ninjas are homophobic.
Kurogane: Wha? How many ninjas have you met?
Yukito: Naruto's homophobic.
Emily: Can't argue with that.
Tomoyo: Ninjas are very homophobic...
Kurogane: Don't judge ninjas based on Naruto! He's a damn brat!
Tomoyo: Yes, he has no appreciation for fashion.
Yukito: Aren't we supposed to be acting?
Kurogane: Shut up! You're such a pain!
Tomoyo: I noticed you have not denied the accusations of homophobia.
Kurogane: And?
Tomoyo: You wouldn't just be holding back on the homophobia because you have a crush on me, would you?
Kurogane:Uh...
Kurogane runs away.
Tomoyo: Ho ho ho.
Emily: You have a messed up laugh.
Yukito: I think Kurogane is homophobic.
Tomoyo: I don't, I just enjoy making him run away.
Yukito: You are a terrible human being.
Tomoyo: Yes, I enjoy being one.
Emily: So do I.
Alert Alert: New Functions And An Event!
New Function #1: Fictional Shakespeare. Fai will probably appear in every play,though. However, Eragon, Tomoyo, Eva-nyan, Kuron-puu,and Usagi will have lots of roles too...
New Function #2: Book Review!
Event: I will go to my sister Chestnut's graduation Thursday June 21st, so be on the look out. I'll be the one in all black reading a smuggled in copy of Inheritance.
New Function #2: Book Review!
Event: I will go to my sister Chestnut's graduation Thursday June 21st, so be on the look out. I'll be the one in all black reading a smuggled in copy of Inheritance.
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
We Review:The Mediator Book 5!
MEG CABOT, YOU ARE A COMEDIC GENIUS. However, aside from the comedy, the shifter thing was a total letdown. I was hoping for Paul to be actually the spawn of Satan, but he wasn't, which sucked. Seriously, the Alice in The Last Apprentice thing was so cool that I hoped for another demon child, but it was not to be. Now I am sad. Here's a transcript of a chat between me and my friend to cheer you up, she also has a blog but I do not know the URL. I changed all names, so... Ta da!
22:46 Petronella: Hi
did u get this
hello?
hi ANSWER
22:47 ARE U THERE
HELLO?
ANY ONE THERE?!
22:48 Necrogirl: Oh.MII CHAN FROM NEKO RAMEN RULES
Petronella: HUZZAH!!!!!
Necrogirl: Im weird
Petronella: U ANWERD
Necrogirl: 42
wth?
Petronella: I <3 Taisho from Neko Ramen.
22:49 I think that's how u spell his name
Necrogirl: I I heart Mii-chan
22:50 Did i put in a extra i there?
Petronella: yes
22:51 Necrogirl: i am thinking of noodles
i am typing thknd ehilt koojjnh khtbd ringor/
22:52
| 15 minutes |
23:07 Necrogirl: kill
| 14 minutes |
23:21 Petronella: :) :D
23:22 ok? I fixed grammar and spelling mistakes, and I apologize as to how late we are up. And no, we were NOT on drugs or possessed.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
I Know You Missed Me...
Holidays that should exist:
Mention Manga Characters Randomly Day
Act Like Your Favorite Eragon Character Day
Wear Outfits That Looked Like Tomoyo Designed Them Day(I want to see the celebration for this one)
Say 'I'm Evil' Day(if you don't see how Eva-nyan is related to this post, read this line carefully)
UPDATE:
OH YEAH! Talk In An Accent Day! ( A girl in my class mentioned that this should exist)
Mention Manga Characters Randomly Day
Act Like Your Favorite Eragon Character Day
Wear Outfits That Looked Like Tomoyo Designed Them Day(I want to see the celebration for this one)
Say 'I'm Evil' Day(if you don't see how Eva-nyan is related to this post, read this line carefully)
UPDATE:
OH YEAH! Talk In An Accent Day! ( A girl in my class mentioned that this should exist)
Sunday, June 10, 2012
I'm Gonna Go And Be Annoying! Yaaaaaaaaay!
I am really happy today. Everything seems all flowers and sweetness.
ON FINISHING INHERITANCE
Yaaaaaaay! Elva-chan got a role in the climax!
ON CLEANING MY ROOM
Yaaaaaaaaay! I have lots of paper to draw on!
ON WORKING ON MY ESSAY
Yaaaaaaaaaaaay! I get to go to my favorite bookstore tomorrow as a celebration for finishing this!
Basically, I have been a manic Fai D. Flowright/ the Doctor ,and both when scared, clone all day. I have been mentally screaming YAY LIFE! This may be because I finished Inheritance or because I had some really good toast. You be the judge. GODDAMMIT I JUST MADE THE WORLD'S MOST COMMON ACCIDENTAL CARDCAPTOR SAKURA REFERENCE.
ON FINISHING INHERITANCE
Yaaaaaaay! Elva-chan got a role in the climax!
ON CLEANING MY ROOM
Yaaaaaaaaay! I have lots of paper to draw on!
ON WORKING ON MY ESSAY
Yaaaaaaaaaaaay! I get to go to my favorite bookstore tomorrow as a celebration for finishing this!
Basically, I have been a manic Fai D. Flowright/ the Doctor ,and both when scared, clone all day. I have been mentally screaming YAY LIFE! This may be because I finished Inheritance or because I had some really good toast. You be the judge. GODDAMMIT I JUST MADE THE WORLD'S MOST COMMON ACCIDENTAL CARDCAPTOR SAKURA REFERENCE.
Friday, June 8, 2012
I'm Bored, So I'll Yell At Life
Okay, I won't really yell at life, but I will yell at Glee. Yes, I watch Glee! And Downton Abbey! And wear other colors than black(occasionally)! And read W.I.T.C.H.! Who is this woman, you ask? Well,actually the W.I.T.C.H. isn't out of character for me, but...WHY WILL EVERYONE ALWAYS HATE ON MY FAVORITE CHARACTER? By 'hate on', I mean ignore. My favorite is(surprise,surprise) Tina. I like Quinn too, though. I am also angry at Downton Abbey for getting rid of one of my favorite characters.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH I just spent a post talking about TV. Yech. In other news, three of my idiotic peers were jumping rope, and they were all great. But, before anyone would start jumping, they said "How many boyfriends do you have?", and the answer was how many jumps they made. One jumped 24 times, and I ended up secretly deciding to make the question 'How many people have you killed?'. As I went inside, I told one of them 'Mass murderer!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH I just spent a post talking about TV. Yech. In other news, three of my idiotic peers were jumping rope, and they were all great. But, before anyone would start jumping, they said "How many boyfriends do you have?", and the answer was how many jumps they made. One jumped 24 times, and I ended up secretly deciding to make the question 'How many people have you killed?'. As I went inside, I told one of them 'Mass murderer!
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Useless News
1.I went to Shakespeare in the Park! We saw As You Like It, and it RULED. Totally superior.
2.By the way, my sister is in the CAE Punchathon.You can sponsor her at this link.
3.I am on Chapter 2 of my new homedrawn Magical Girl manga. My old one wasn't too good, but this new one will probably be better.
4.Did you know that the Doctor and Fai D. Florite, Flowright, whatever you call him, are really similar in many ways, but they both get manically peppy when scared or when their deep,dark secret is about to be revealed?
5.My new favorite song is The Doctor Is Dying, by Chameleon Circuit. It is completely superior.
6.River and the Doctor are not an item!
2.By the way, my sister is in the CAE Punchathon.You can sponsor her at this link.
3.I am on Chapter 2 of my new homedrawn Magical Girl manga. My old one wasn't too good, but this new one will probably be better.
4.Did you know that the Doctor and Fai D. Florite, Flowright, whatever you call him, are really similar in many ways, but they both get manically peppy when scared or when their deep,dark secret is about to be revealed?
5.My new favorite song is The Doctor Is Dying, by Chameleon Circuit. It is completely superior.
6.River and the Doctor are not an item!
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Wednesday Pointless List: Tokyo Mew Mew edition!
WHAT I LIKE ABOUT TOKYO MEW MEW:
Zakuro is BLOODY AWESOME. She's like a girl version of Yue from Cardcaptor Sakura.
Pudding. Tart. BEST COUPLE EVER!
Mew Mew Kindergarten at the end of each volume.
Speaking of kindergarten,that one scene where Tart attacks Ichigo.
WHAT I DISLIKE ABOUT TOKYO MEW MEW:
Tokyo Mew Mew A La Mode. Even thinking about Mew Berry makes me break out in hives.
Ichigo's love life.
The fact that Zakuro is always given short shrift.
Masaya Aoyama. Ick.
Zakuro is BLOODY AWESOME. She's like a girl version of Yue from Cardcaptor Sakura.
Pudding. Tart. BEST COUPLE EVER!
Mew Mew Kindergarten at the end of each volume.
Speaking of kindergarten,that one scene where Tart attacks Ichigo.
WHAT I DISLIKE ABOUT TOKYO MEW MEW:
Tokyo Mew Mew A La Mode. Even thinking about Mew Berry makes me break out in hives.
Ichigo's love life.
The fact that Zakuro is always given short shrift.
Masaya Aoyama. Ick.
Monday, May 28, 2012
A Hate Letter To Ichigo Momomiya
&*@# you. Why on earth do you think you can refer to yourself as 'oh-so-powerful'? You aren't just breaking the Magical Girl Code Of Conduct, you're being a jerk, and guess what? NONE OF YOUR WAY AWESOMER FRIENDS REFERRED TO THEMSELVES AS POWERFUL. NONE. Now what does this mean? That your friends don't feel the need to prop themselves up on ego? That you compulsively one-ups all of your so-called 'friends'? That you have a sense of girliness that makes you use hideous phrasing?
I will not even begin on the fact that you have no obstacles between you and the three hot guys falling at your feet, while the immeasurably cooler Evangeline had her true love disappear for 12 years and when she saw him again, he was only a hologram. The far cooler Syaoran had the girl he loved's memories of him erased. The incredibly cooler Arisa Uotani- All right, I'll stop. Hey. Speaking of magical girls. YOU AREN'T EVEN #$@^%%ING CLOSE TO THE POWER OF *&@@$ING SAILOR #@@$ING MERCURY, AND SHE'S THE @$@$ING WEAKEST SAILOR GUARDIAN. YOU SHOULD JUST CRAWL INTO A HOLE AND #$#@ING DIE.
Thank you very much.
UPDATE: Actually Pudding referred to herself as powerful, but it would be dumb to not think she would. She's Pudding.
I will not even begin on the fact that you have no obstacles between you and the three hot guys falling at your feet, while the immeasurably cooler Evangeline had her true love disappear for 12 years and when she saw him again, he was only a hologram. The far cooler Syaoran had the girl he loved's memories of him erased. The incredibly cooler Arisa Uotani- All right, I'll stop. Hey. Speaking of magical girls. YOU AREN'T EVEN #$@^%%ING CLOSE TO THE POWER OF *&@@$ING SAILOR #@@$ING MERCURY, AND SHE'S THE @$@$ING WEAKEST SAILOR GUARDIAN. YOU SHOULD JUST CRAWL INTO A HOLE AND #$#@ING DIE.
Thank you very much.
UPDATE: Actually Pudding referred to herself as powerful, but it would be dumb to not think she would. She's Pudding.
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Things That Disturb Me
There are two things that scare the @$#& out of me on the Internet.
1. This song. This is so scary. It's just like... eating a raw sea otter. It just...yikes. For my otter-obsessed sister, this doesn't have any effect, but on me, I have about 2 seconds before running away screaming. But it doesn't have anything on...this. It is so horrifying. It starts out ordinary, but rapidly devolves into sheer horror. It's like getting eaten alive by zombies and werewolves and those bugs from Gone and then being puked up into a fairy's disemboweled intestines. However, the rest of that site is fairly cool.
1. This song. This is so scary. It's just like... eating a raw sea otter. It just...yikes. For my otter-obsessed sister, this doesn't have any effect, but on me, I have about 2 seconds before running away screaming. But it doesn't have anything on...this. It is so horrifying. It starts out ordinary, but rapidly devolves into sheer horror. It's like getting eaten alive by zombies and werewolves and those bugs from Gone and then being puked up into a fairy's disemboweled intestines. However, the rest of that site is fairly cool.
Friday, May 25, 2012
I'm Sorry, Really!
SO sorry for not posting. I can't find a way to apologize, so here's a dream I had a while ago!
Before I tell my dream, I should give you a little background: I am NEVER in my dreams. Computer game avatars of myself? YES. The Doctor?YES,OFTEN. Fai D. Flowright? YES, ONCE. Me? NEVER.
In the dream, the Doctor was talking to a Roman. The Roman was an alien who needed the Doctor to send a shipment of cylinders to his home world. The Doctor said yes. As the Doctor neared the planet, a nearby black hole exploded. The Doctor kept trying to see whether any life was on the planet, but whenever he got near, he couldn't breathe, but Amy and Rory still could. Then a giant crack opened in the universe and he could. HEY WHOA I JUST DREAMED UP THE PLOT OF A DOCTOR WHO EPISODE! Bet we'll see this in Season 7.
Before I tell my dream, I should give you a little background: I am NEVER in my dreams. Computer game avatars of myself? YES. The Doctor?YES,OFTEN. Fai D. Flowright? YES, ONCE. Me? NEVER.
In the dream, the Doctor was talking to a Roman. The Roman was an alien who needed the Doctor to send a shipment of cylinders to his home world. The Doctor said yes. As the Doctor neared the planet, a nearby black hole exploded. The Doctor kept trying to see whether any life was on the planet, but whenever he got near, he couldn't breathe, but Amy and Rory still could. Then a giant crack opened in the universe and he could. HEY WHOA I JUST DREAMED UP THE PLOT OF A DOCTOR WHO EPISODE! Bet we'll see this in Season 7.
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
WARNING- I AM ABOUT TO DO SOMETHING HORRIBLE
I'm sorry for not posting in a while but...
Momo Mouse, I misplaced my cell phone. Can you put the math homework in the comments because I didn't write it down?
*sound of readers screaming, running away, and throwing stuff at me*
Momo Mouse, I misplaced my cell phone. Can you put the math homework in the comments because I didn't write it down?
*sound of readers screaming, running away, and throwing stuff at me*
Monday, May 14, 2012
The Shortest Post Ever
In math class today:
Jessie: You smell like cheese!
Kyo: Well, you smell like... Teen Spirit!
All names have been changed to protect identities.
Jessie: You smell like cheese!
Kyo: Well, you smell like... Teen Spirit!
All names have been changed to protect identities.
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
And now, the Wednesday Pointless List
THINGS IT IS FUN TO SAY IN A MATT SMITH VOICE
1. 'They told me to get a job cleaning out the shit buckets'.
2. 'Really? You had to do that now?'
3. Anything ever said by Fai D. Flowright(or Florite)
4. 'Look! Moon Bunny!'
I wanted a top 13 list, but there wasn't enough things...
Look out for updates!
Update:
6. 'If you ever do that again, I will pin you down and lick you from head to toe.'
7. 'Don't go killing me off without my say-so!'
1. 'They told me to get a job cleaning out the shit buckets'.
2. 'Really? You had to do that now?'
3. Anything ever said by Fai D. Flowright(or Florite)
4. 'Look! Moon Bunny!'
I wanted a top 13 list, but there wasn't enough things...
Look out for updates!
Update:
6. 'If you ever do that again, I will pin you down and lick you from head to toe.'
7. 'Don't go killing me off without my say-so!'
Monday, May 7, 2012
Who Would Make Such A Thing?
In Social Studies, we watched John Adams: The Movie(not its actual title, unfortunately). All about our bald lawyer second president. Why? Was this movie formulated for Social Studies class? WTF? Movie makers, don't ever do this ...thing again.
By the way, it was very grainy, and none of the actors were attractive. This might actually be the movie version of ORIGINAL SIN. This unreal horror( seriously, Leo-kun is the only reason we watch Titanic) was unrescued by the only good thing about it: a redcoat said, in a voice that sounded exactly like Matt Smith's : 'They told me to get a job cleaning out the shit buckets.'
By the way, it was very grainy, and none of the actors were attractive. This might actually be the movie version of ORIGINAL SIN. This unreal horror( seriously, Leo-kun is the only reason we watch Titanic) was unrescued by the only good thing about it: a redcoat said, in a voice that sounded exactly like Matt Smith's : 'They told me to get a job cleaning out the shit buckets.'
Thursday, May 3, 2012
I Don't Believe The Stuff People Say
Here is what I heard from the table next to me in math class(all names have been changed to protect identity).
Kate: Oh, Harry, why didn't you get on honor roll? You read so much.
Ruby: Yeah, he reads so much.
Harry was reading a book of cartoons from a webcomic in the middle of math class. They were really bad. I read just as many books, and of a no doubt better quality.However, these girls had also formed a club entirely to go against another club because they didn't like the clubs leader(in their defense, he was a total jerk), and they got on honor roll Gold, so I won't pretend to know the grading system.
IN OTHER NEWS
Blogger just made a pop-up that said 'Blogger Wants to Know Your Location'. Sorry, Blogger, but that seems uncomfortaly stalkery.
Kate: Oh, Harry, why didn't you get on honor roll? You read so much.
Ruby: Yeah, he reads so much.
Harry was reading a book of cartoons from a webcomic in the middle of math class. They were really bad. I read just as many books, and of a no doubt better quality.However, these girls had also formed a club entirely to go against another club because they didn't like the clubs leader(in their defense, he was a total jerk), and they got on honor roll Gold, so I won't pretend to know the grading system.
IN OTHER NEWS
Blogger just made a pop-up that said 'Blogger Wants to Know Your Location'. Sorry, Blogger, but that seems uncomfortaly stalkery.
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
We Review: The Monster
Okay, my mom has a literary blog, so my house gets wonderful deliveries of books that aren't even out in hardcover yet, i.e., Troubletwisters book 2. I read one of these, and my comment is:
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GET SOME OTHER TROUBLETWISTERS IN THERE. You think readers will be happy with just two magic kids? They won't, believe me. In a book 1 this is OK, but out of that it is NOT.
Other than that, the book was great. It gets extra points for having a mutated axolotl in it. Mutated axolotl! Mutated Axolotl would actually be a great band name. It could play weird arrhythmic void rock. MUTATED AXOLOTL: THE INSANE TOUR.
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GET SOME OTHER TROUBLETWISTERS IN THERE. You think readers will be happy with just two magic kids? They won't, believe me. In a book 1 this is OK, but out of that it is NOT.
Other than that, the book was great. It gets extra points for having a mutated axolotl in it. Mutated axolotl! Mutated Axolotl would actually be a great band name. It could play weird arrhythmic void rock. MUTATED AXOLOTL: THE INSANE TOUR.
Wow This Brought A Lot Of Trouble
I'm back.
Didya miss me?
I have to write something about this here to stop horrific things from happening.
Okay, people who google the ELA pineapple story, why are you clicking on the link to my blog? Why are you even googling the pineapple story? Why are you clicking on a blog for this? MY BLOG IS NOT SOME WEIRD BLOG DEVOTED TO THE PINEAPPLE STORY! Wait, that actually sounds really good. I mean, a blog about a talking pineapple?
Didya miss me?
I have to write something about this here to stop horrific things from happening.
Okay, people who google the ELA pineapple story, why are you clicking on the link to my blog? Why are you even googling the pineapple story? Why are you clicking on a blog for this? MY BLOG IS NOT SOME WEIRD BLOG DEVOTED TO THE PINEAPPLE STORY! Wait, that actually sounds really good. I mean, a blog about a talking pineapple?
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Things That Have Nothing To Do With Each Other
THING 1
Overheard at school:
'Well, I was trying to be nice. I called her 'person' instead of 'weirdo' like I usually do.
THING 2
I have OCD-ish habits.
1: I always push my mechanical pencil lead out to 1 inch or such. Everyone hates it, but I still can't stop from doing it.
2:When eating chickpeas, I must chew one on one side of the mouth, then the next on the other side. ALWAYS.
3: When I shave my legs and/or armpits, I have a need for them to be perfectly smooth and hairless. I never end up with hairlessness, so I always get upset when I finish shaving. I would just not shave,but I can't, because THAT IS EVEN WORSE. I have a longing for a razor that can cut straight through steel that could make my legs/armpits so hairless they look drawn.
Overheard at school:
'Well, I was trying to be nice. I called her 'person' instead of 'weirdo' like I usually do.
THING 2
I have OCD-ish habits.
1: I always push my mechanical pencil lead out to 1 inch or such. Everyone hates it, but I still can't stop from doing it.
2:When eating chickpeas, I must chew one on one side of the mouth, then the next on the other side. ALWAYS.
3: When I shave my legs and/or armpits, I have a need for them to be perfectly smooth and hairless. I never end up with hairlessness, so I always get upset when I finish shaving. I would just not shave,but I can't, because THAT IS EVEN WORSE. I have a longing for a razor that can cut straight through steel that could make my legs/armpits so hairless they look drawn.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Calling All Spam
Why? Why do I have no spam?
Seriously. No spam. Spammers do not find me worthy.
GIMME SOME SPAM! PLEASE! I'M BEGGING!
Also, I find the spam vaguely amusing.
Seriously. No spam. Spammers do not find me worthy.
GIMME SOME SPAM! PLEASE! I'M BEGGING!
Also, I find the spam vaguely amusing.
Friday, April 20, 2012
Nightmares
Some people are scared of that werewolf-dog from The Neverending Story .
Some of ghosts. Some of Weeping Angels.
I never cared a fig about ghosts (at least how scary they are). I don't just get scared at night. Once in math class, I felt like someone was staring at me from behind, and I thought OMG THE SILENCE WILL KILL ME!!!!!! But, what I am truly scared of are...
Those parasite bugs from Plague that bite you, and then they eat you from within. Every time I feel weird or numb, I scratch myself to see whether they aren't injecting their numbing thing into me and eating me alive from within.
I'm sorry for scaring you.
Some of ghosts. Some of Weeping Angels.
I never cared a fig about ghosts (at least how scary they are). I don't just get scared at night. Once in math class, I felt like someone was staring at me from behind, and I thought OMG THE SILENCE WILL KILL ME!!!!!! But, what I am truly scared of are...
Those parasite bugs from Plague that bite you, and then they eat you from within. Every time I feel weird or numb, I scratch myself to see whether they aren't injecting their numbing thing into me and eating me alive from within.
I'm sorry for scaring you.
My Feelings About the Pineapple Story
1. Why did I not get this on my test? I got a bunch of baloney about appreciating the beauty of nature(the author of which labeled me as a cynic) and people get something that is actually entertaining?
2. Isn't it illegal for something on the ELA to be entertaining?
3. I don't understand why this is so controversial. Nothing on the ELA makes sense. This is no different.
4. I think my jab at the author of Take Time Out To Watch The Sunset (I kid you not) about him saying I'm cynical has just been disintegrated by my last two opinions... (..')
2. Isn't it illegal for something on the ELA to be entertaining?
3. I don't understand why this is so controversial. Nothing on the ELA makes sense. This is no different.
4. I think my jab at the author of Take Time Out To Watch The Sunset (I kid you not) about him saying I'm cynical has just been disintegrated by my last two opinions... (..')
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
ELA IS WII(oh god I'm going to fail it now)
I have just had to take THE ULTIMATE TORTURE: The ELA. Interesting tidbits my readers almost certainly didn't know:
You are not allowed to have independent reading the week of the ELA. This is banned on the grounds that it might be cheating.
All clocks must be covered the week of the math test, for the same reason as the independent reading.
If you are going to see a Shakespeare play with the other Drama majors the day after one of the days the math test is on, it is cancelled.
After you finish the ELA, YOU MUST NOT:
read
take anything out of your bag
have anything out of your bag except a pencil.
do anything except sit there
bring a pillow.
You are not allowed to have independent reading the week of the ELA. This is banned on the grounds that it might be cheating.
All clocks must be covered the week of the math test, for the same reason as the independent reading.
If you are going to see a Shakespeare play with the other Drama majors the day after one of the days the math test is on, it is cancelled.
After you finish the ELA, YOU MUST NOT:
read
take anything out of your bag
have anything out of your bag except a pencil.
do anything except sit there
bring a pillow.
Monday, April 16, 2012
GERMANY GERMANY GERMANY
SOMEONE IN GERMANY SAW THIS BLOG!
oh no... i was so stuck up just then... WHAT IF IT WAS CHANCELLOR ANGELA MERKEL WHO SAW THIS BLOG? AND... Now I'm getting ridiculous. Seriously ridiculous. I hate me. No... I hate Germany for doing this to me.
oh no... i was so stuck up just then... WHAT IF IT WAS CHANCELLOR ANGELA MERKEL WHO SAW THIS BLOG? AND... Now I'm getting ridiculous. Seriously ridiculous. I hate me. No... I hate Germany for doing this to me.
This Post is LIVE
Have you seen that ad where the maniacal guy is holding two wires together and grinning, and all around it it says LIVE LIVE LIVE? Well, I recently discovered it is an add for a home decor show.
...
WTF? Live home decor? Why would anyone even WATCH this?Home decor is boring and making it live doesn't make it less boring.
...
WTF? Live home decor? Why would anyone even WATCH this?Home decor is boring and making it live doesn't make it less boring.
Saturday, April 14, 2012
DIRTY-SOUNDING FAIRY TALE NAMES
The Brave Little Tailor( I saw an illustration from this one and it looks...dirty)
Prince Darling
Tuxedo La Smoking Bomber(SORRY TO ANYONE WHO KNOWS THIS ISN'T A FAIRY TALE)
Sleeping Beauty
The Faithful Servant
Prince Darling
Tuxedo La Smoking Bomber(SORRY TO ANYONE WHO KNOWS THIS ISN'T A FAIRY TALE)
Sleeping Beauty
The Faithful Servant
Scooters
These are the example labels I get: scooters,vacation, and fall.
I have no problem with vacation/fall, but scooters? Who would write a blog post about scooters?
Hey, that sounds like a drug...(scooters I mean)
...
Maybe I don't want to know who.
I have no problem with vacation/fall, but scooters? Who would write a blog post about scooters?
Hey, that sounds like a drug...(scooters I mean)
...
Maybe I don't want to know who.
K or F
The k in my blog title looks like an f.I had more to say, but my friend Momo Mouse( she requested this name) is watching.
Now she isn't.
When I typed this title, this is what the computer thought it was:
Frankenstein Forum for Friday 2/24
Why? How? Moose?
Sorry ,I'm listening to the Woody Allen: Part 2: The Moose. This is not going to help with the blogging quality.
Now she isn't.
When I typed this title, this is what the computer thought it was:
Frankenstein Forum for Friday 2/24
Why? How? Moose?
Sorry ,I'm listening to the Woody Allen: Part 2: The Moose. This is not going to help with the blogging quality.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
In Memoriam
WARNING:THIS HAZ SPOILERZ ABOUT WARRIORS!
Hollyleaf shouldn't have died.
I read The Last Hope, and now I am angry.
For non-Warriors geeks, here's a brief Hollyleaf synopsis.
She was made to believe that she had powers, even though she didn't.
She discovered that her existence was against everything she believed in.
She had everything she loved taken away from her.
Then, she died.
She was ridiculously awesome, also.
HELLO?! AM I THE ONLY ONE ANGRY ABOUT THIS? THIS JUST ISN'T RIGHT! THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED TO JOB, ONLY HE WASN'T AWESOME! AND SHE WAS A GOOD PERSON, TOO! SHE GAVE HER LIFE FOR THE VERY PEOPLE WHO HAD REJECTED HER!
Any comments that are funeral speeches will be appreciated.
Hollyleaf shouldn't have died.
I read The Last Hope, and now I am angry.
For non-Warriors geeks, here's a brief Hollyleaf synopsis.
She was made to believe that she had powers, even though she didn't.
She discovered that her existence was against everything she believed in.
She had everything she loved taken away from her.
Then, she died.
She was ridiculously awesome, also.
HELLO?! AM I THE ONLY ONE ANGRY ABOUT THIS? THIS JUST ISN'T RIGHT! THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED TO JOB, ONLY HE WASN'T AWESOME! AND SHE WAS A GOOD PERSON, TOO! SHE GAVE HER LIFE FOR THE VERY PEOPLE WHO HAD REJECTED HER!
Any comments that are funeral speeches will be appreciated.
...
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Hi.
This is my blog.
...
...
...
...
This is getting awkward.
I would put something here, but I don't know what.
...
...
...
Okay.
If you want anything that makes sense,you've come to the wrong place.
This is a blog that is going to be mainly literary. No literary criticism, but funerals, comments about the horribility of LOTR, and lots of Doctor Who. And general fury.
*sound of all English teachers on Earth running away from my horrible grammar*
...
...
...
Hi.
This is my blog.
...
...
...
...
This is getting awkward.
I would put something here, but I don't know what.
...
...
...
Okay.
If you want anything that makes sense,you've come to the wrong place.
This is a blog that is going to be mainly literary. No literary criticism, but funerals, comments about the horribility of LOTR, and lots of Doctor Who. And general fury.
*sound of all English teachers on Earth running away from my horrible grammar*
...
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